You know what pisses me off the most? Shitty wood. It’s worse than posers decked out in cubic zirconia and socks pretending to be fucking sneakers. There’s been too much shitty wood in this world for too long. It’s time to put a stop to it.

Genesis, Hyundai’s new luxury brand, recently launched the third member of its lineup, the 2019 Genesis G70 luxury sports sedan. It’s a wonderful car, but its presence orients Genesis’ current trajectory eerily in the direction of Cadillac’s: heavy on sedans and too light on the SUVs and crossovers that everyone is…

Good morning! Welcome to The Morning Shift, your roundup of the auto news you crave, all in one place every weekday morning. Here are the stories you need to know.

For 364 days of the year, New Yorkers curse the Metropolitan Transportation Authority and the subway because it is dogshit and prone to filth-waterfalls. But on that one special day, all of the hellish treatment pales in comparison to this one asshole who brought his motorcycle onto the subway.

Infamous for having a strict application process for interested buyers, the new Ford GT frustrated a lot of people due to the how the law of supply and demand works. But if you’re one of the people who are eager for round two, then listen up: Ford is going to reopen the application process later this year, according…

Being a car salesperson can be a tough job. I mean, you have to deal with customers, who you and I know are usually the worst kind of people. Then again, the sales people can have their own issues. I feel like no place makes these issues come out more than the test drive. What’s your horror story?

Say you’re a fan of hooning modified Porsche 911s. You have an abandoned Air Force base available to you. And you just really, really loved Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 4. What do you do?

The Lexus LC 500 and 500h flagship coupes, Jalopnik favorites, are apparently getting a dealer cash incentive until the end of the month. This is big if you’re currently in the market for one.

Of the three current Genesis offerings, I was most excited for the 2019 Genesis G70. The smaller and more athletic one. The one with a manual. And rear-wheel drive. And a mechanical limited-slip differential and launch control. The sports sedan. It didn’t disappoint at all. If the Germans think they can keep sitting…

Driving down New Jersey’s Route 34, you immediately knew who was going to Formula Drift and who was not. A long file of lowered Subaru WRXs, stanced BRZs, enloudened Mitsubishi Evos and lowered Volkswagen Golfs, right turn blinkers flashing frenetically, awaited their turn into the stadium parking lot during one…

The Nissan GT-R50 by Italdesign that we saw last month was, in a word, polarizing. I thought it looked great. Most of you disagreed. Well, if I had over a million bucks, I’d buy one just to spite all of you.

I know what you’re thinking. You took one look at this shadowy render, read the horsepower figure in the headline, climbed to the roof of your house and screamed to the neighborhood, “THAT’S BULLSHIT!” But no, dude, you’re wrong. The Alieno Arcanum is definitely happening. I’m, like, so convinced of it.

It’s officially summer and I’m told that the commonfolk start bellyaching for something called a “vacation” during these warm months. I suppose it’s something of a break from the “work” they do to “earn” money and pay their “bills.” But what the hell, I decided to try out this vacation to see what all the fuss is…

Names are one of the most important parts of cars. Names represent a car in the abstract, act as a stand-in for them when they aren’t physically before you. Names can evoke wonder or awe or even laughter. But which are the best car names?

No, it’s not M for murder, nor is it M for another automaker’s performance arm. Volvo’s M stands for mobility, which is a new brand that it launched yesterday that users will be able to access via an app.

The current-generation, 2018 BMW M5 is a 600-horsepower, AWD war hammer that really does feel like it can take on anything on the road and win. What do you want to know about it?

Let me tell you, I’m sick and tired of rolling up to clubs with my Rolls-Royces and Bentleys. Too easy, too predictable. Give me a true show stopper. Give me this three-person Formula One car. I bet you this is getting me to the front of the VIP line.

I’ve got umbrellas on the brain ever since I found out that the 2019 Aston Martin DB11 Volante can be optioned with one. The trouble is, only the hyper-exclusive cars seem to come with them. What’s up with that?

The northeastern United States experienced some near-record high temperatures this past weekend. These extreme temperatures not only affected how people spent their time outdoors (see also: didn’t), but also the infrastructure. That’s when you know it’s officially Too Damn Hot Out. Clarification: The heat affects how…