I got my douchebag brother in law in the secret santa. Gift dilemma solved!

The real facepalm moment is that it took me all of fifteen seconds while reading this story to come up with an alternate slogan. "Bavarian Black Lager - We'll make your taste buds say the safe word." You even get to keep the specious S&M imagery that way.

Keeping that bar low, CT and NC.

Right? Being concerned about the health of an animal obviously means you hate the cat.

Is it not just a little troubling that it took an adult woman "hours of prayer, talking with [her] parents and re-reading [her] words" to realize that her words were insulting and poor taste.

That shit drives me nuts. As I said over on Gawker, you don't need many hours of prayer to know you just slagged on two teenagers you've never met for nothing. You don't need five minutes. Jesus, to quote Anne Lamott, is drinking gin straight out of the cat dish and rolling His eyes so hard they're gonna stick that…

The children of presidents are always under incredible scrutiny, and yet the only thing the Obama daughters can be criticized for is not dressing formally to meet a TURKEY. Think about that for awhile, Ms. Lauten. Maybe it will actually sink in.

This.

I had a boyfriend in college who went completely off the rails after I broke up with him. He sent 2-3 emails every day for months with violent threats that were just vague enough that the police couldn't do anything about it.

He was, and for a long time. But it just drives home for me what a lose-lose situation street harassment can be. You never know who's a creep v. who's a dangerous creep.

Mike Brown's family's statement was far classier and restrained than mine would have been. My heart goes out to them.

I do have to say. That throughout this whole ordeal Mike Brown's parents have continually impressed me. There is just something to be said about enduring your loss (which must be a horrible thing to endure) while still wanting peace.

The other day I was walking home and some dude started hitting on me/borderline catcalling me in German. Yeah, well, I grew up in Germany and have taken classes in high school, college, and at my local Goethe Institut. The joke was definitely on him when I answered back in fluent German.

Have you ever had a guy make 'kissy' sounds? It's so much creepier than a stranger talking about my body or what he would do to it. It's more aggressive (to me) somehow.

I'll try to tune in. I'm hyper aware of my surrounding. But that doesn't mean I'm catching everything.

Ugh, I feel you. I told my husband and said, "yeah this is why women are freaked out by catcalling," and he was like, "Well that guy was a psycho, not a catcaller." Or, you know, BOTH. And it's like, uh yeah, but how do we know when ignoring or rejecting a guy is going to go from him yelling to him stabbing? I've had…

I love how organized your fears were... I'm a sucker for having everything in its place.

Well, as a lady boss, you get it from all sides.

You get dickhead employees assuming that because you're a lady, you're a pushover. So you have to have the playground fight with every fucking single one and make it plain you don't give a shit what they think of you and that you're watching and judging the quality of…

Performing a vagina monologue?

O'Keeffing