So we’ll march day and night by the big cooling tower

Now do Classic Gas!

Welcome to the club, comrades!

I was going to joke about the writers becoming lazy and surly like the Teamsters, but then I remembered, this is The Onion!

Sometimes it feels like I’m posting nothin’ at all!

THE AV CLUB NEEDS DISQUS

Unhelpfully.

How did Ernie the Kinja Tech vote?

I bet Patrick Schwarzenegger sounds even more like his dad when his character exclaims, “It’s not a tumor!”

Ok, I actually watch a few firearms channels on YouTube. I watch Forgotten Weapons, who mainly concentrates on the engineering behind them and there is a guy called DemolitionRanch who... I’m 99% sure is not politically aligned with me, but he’s quite charismatic and he fires guns into fruit and stuff.

What about...these guns?

Too Much Innards

That Man’s Insides

It’s why crane-style fighters are famous for burying their heads directly into the ground and giving themselves concussions when they try to fight on land

He’s one of the few people who could go around saying “Help! The evil robots and aliens are coming!” and not be labeled a complete fucking lunatic.

Barry Allen has all but run through the streets of Central City naked with the words “I Am The Flash” spraypainted on his chest and nobody knows the truth. The people of Central City are dumber than doorknobs  

lol, ok writers. Ill see you in 3 episodes max when he’s no longer in prison cause reasons.

“endless, dispiriting pivots to video by major media organizations”

(Dis)Honourable mention goes to Kinja.