I’m now convinced that Pierre is being held Inside the Glass against his will.

So...how much is Vlade gonna give away to the Suns in order to move up one spot in the draft and select his Slavic comrade?

What did I just say?

Look at Frankie’s face as he runs away; he’s having so much fun! Someone on the Astros is gonna bean him for that shit.

As an American, I know that I suck at geography, but I can say rather confidently that his career is going south.

Also, HOW HAS IT BEEN SEVEN YEARS SINCE THE COLON-O-METER CAME OUT?!?!?!?

Kid Orgy!

This has to rank somewhere between a 7 and a 9 on the pettiness scale. Fuck you, Jeff Fis[c]her.

An historically embarrassing Cavaliers loss like this? LeBron is totally leaving this summer.

That ended exactly how I wanted it to. Thank you, Lauren, for motivating me to watch it all the way through.

This:

Lolo Jones

*Looks at watch*

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned 

At least Marlins fans will inevtiably have a gift basket to look forward to after all of the screwing.

He wasn’t confusing them; he was just uncertain.

No one cares

Even when they make a solid hire, they do it in the Brownsiest way possible.