Eli, sadly, was not invited

They’ll probably charge him with battery.

I come to this website for SPORTS only... what is the score of the game? That’s all I want to know...

And yet still thinner than your mom.

“...send their consciousness through time and into other people’s bodies...”

Hey, don’t rule it out.

Sorry, but holy Jesus upside down on a cross, could you please change the title of your post from something not so spoilery? I have been avoiding anything from that movie for as long as possible, and sure enough, bam, here it is. It’s not enough that we have plot spoiling trailers, but now this?!?!?

Dawkins is out the rest of the game with a hyperextended third leg.

Karjakin is also a great way to kill time in traffic.

I agree. If anything, his nickname should be “Bleached Asshole.”

I really wish that Oprah had never brought Dr.’s Phil & Oz out of the grays.

I would be angry at the whole world too, if i drove a Chevy Aveo.

Why focus on things like rape prevention when we can have a hypothetical conversation about whether or not these sentient robots are being sexually assaulted? Like don’t you know that robots need consent too?

Hell. In hell he’s weeping. But it probably sounds all raspy because he’s got a noose around his neck for eternity.

+1 Threaux up.

He’s tried to make me geaux to rehab
I won’t geaux, geaux, geaux.

There sure is. And you can bet he won’t be paying for her tuition anymore.

Okay but like that Black Jeopardy re-sketch is one of the most outstanding things SNL has produced in YEARS, on basically every level.

Carville replied, “Frog dont jump no fricasee gator run a slim jim.”

“We need a tank”