Ah yes, ATPDDICBDWB (attempting to pursue due diligence in consummating business deal while black)

I think we’ve reached the end of the road with these Emmitt Smith jokes.

I hope he bounces back and they go 17-1 next year for an undefeated Super Bowl season

On my balls, on my dick then I bust a nut quick. On her face, on her chest, stick my dick between her breasts. Come on fellas, let’s get weird. Stick your dick up in her ear.

Calling him a jabroni all you want—at least he’s a professional! He’d never split tens when the dealer is showing a bust card.

Were you playing poker or blackjack? The card game you seem to be describing is most definitely blackjack.

Don’t: Use “Trim” in this context, ever again.

Nothing worse than seeing a former teammate, leader, and inspiration leaving a trail of tears as he walks out the door, one Blackfoot following the other.

Oh, please. Give me a break.

Interviewer: Now that you are retired, are you concerned about CTE?

My husband cannot throw the ball and fetch the ball.

Bartolo Colon is now searching for those delicious meatballs.

Next week post a recipe for banh mi where you substitute zucchini slices for ham.

Using stock is a cop out, using zucchini for noodles is (somehow) acceptable.

The same fan threatened to blow up US Bank Stadium if the Vikings signed Robert Turbin.

If you ever make a fatty beef roast, do yourself a favor and make Yorkshire pudding or popovers with the fat drippings. Yorkshire pudding has a gross name but it’s just a quickbread made with meat fat instead of butter/oil. It’s f’ing delicious and really easy and you can still make a pan sauce with the defatted…

I probably had the cutest girlfriend in all of sixth grade.

Ben needs to be careful and make sure he protects his gray matter. He also should take care of his brain.

vodka:martini :: turkey:bacon

How about smaller goalie pads?