Don't understand the vitriol that exists for her. She's not groundbreaking but she's a good comic. Yeah a lot of her premises are well-tread territory but her jokes are well written. And it's not like she's achieved Dane Cook-like astronomical success where having weird, bitter feelings about her career would be…

I am not throwing away my shot…to see this as soon as possible.

You mean the person that wrote the music, lyrics, and book for and also starred in his own Broadway musical has a bit of an ego? Shocking.

1) To Pimp a Butterfly - Kendrick Lamar
2) In Colour - Jamie xx
3) Carrie & Lowell - Sufjan Stevens
4) Currents - Tame Impala
5) SURF - Donnie Trumpet & the Social Experiment
6) I Love You, Honeybear - Father John Misty
7) Summertime '06 - Vince Staples
8) Painted Shut - Hop Along
9) I Don't Like Shit, I Don't Go Outside -…

Just like the cookies!

JJ must be this close to giving up, facing mad scrutiny
He screams in the face of this mass mutiny

Why do you write like you're running out of time?

Let me tell you what I wish I'd known when I was young and dreamed of glory: you have no control who lives, who dies, who tells your story.

That's when I began to pray - Lord, show me how to say no to this.

You'll be back. Soon you'll see. You'll remember you belong to me. You'll be back. Time will tell. You'll remember that I served you well. Oceans rise. Empires fall. We have seen each other through it all. And when push comes to shove, I will send a fully armed battalion to remind you of my love.

You strike me as a woman who has never been satisfied

You and your words flooded my senses
Your sentences left me defenseless
you built me palaces out of paragraphs
you built cathedrals

And another thing Mr. Age of Enlightenment, don't lecture me about the war, you didn't fight in it!

This financial plan is an outrageous demand and it's too many damn pages for any man to understand!

Especially the insanely wealthy drunk shop.

This is me at the Grand Canyon. Do you see?

As a half-Filipino, I feel compelled to say that we do not claim him. He's had his Filipino card revoked.

If you go to Elle King's Wikipedia page and click on "Personal Life", you're redirected to the section which contains only the sentence "King is a feminist." It's the only thing that matters about her, apparently.

Oh wow, Crosley actually listened and made maybe a halfway decent table that doesn't have a built in speaker? Color me surprised!

Of course he's in third place - he's doing smart, well written comedy and compelling interviews. People don't want that. People would rather watch Fallon smash eggs on Tom Cruise's head and Kimmel coerce parents into making their children cry.