Harrison Ford, known conservative and LeBeouf associate, made a good portion of his millions from his ability to convincingly punch Nazis. THIS IS A BIPARTISAN ISSUE, PEOPLE.

#SeriouslyNaziPunksFuckOff

Yep. For the first time in my life, #I’mWithHimAndByHimIMeanShiaLaBeoufWhichIsWeirdButFuckNazis.

This is the first, and I’m guessing last, time I have ever said to myself, “Good for you, Shia Labeouf!”

What’s up with Bill? Is he still bellyachin’ over Obama’s overshadowing him as the first black president?

Oh dear. I read this and thought, “Oh wow, you don’t hear about too many celebrities moving to DC. I wonder who it is.” I’m completely sober.

A ferocious maternal instinct just kicked in for Billie.

They say girls are attracted to men like their fathers.

oh…

Good. Now can we work on booting Jimmy Fallon for his annoying portrayal of a talk show host?

I was just in Georgia on vacation (down from MA). At a playground with my pregnant wife and twin 2-yr old girls. A father of boy/girl on a bench points to my wife’s belly and says “Are you gonna get the next one right?” She asks “what do you mean?” He says “You know - y’all gonna get it right and have a boy?” My wife…

Cheers to Jay for throwing something correctly.

If I were in a hurricane and Jenny McCarthy told me it was raining I wouldn’t believe it. But removing the source for a second every single bit of what she said is 100% believable.

If I told you how many points I have right now you would be appalled. I am appalled.

I blame Ryan Seacrest for 2016.

I don’t know if Ryan Seacrest has really done anything horrible to warrant my hatred towards him but part of me is sure he has.

I was gonna say more of a grumpy hybrid of Omar Epps and Will.I.Am but angry frog is also very apt.

Who knew, for someone who perpetually looks like an angry frog (Magary’s words, not mine), Tomlin has an excellent grasp on shade. I also hate the Steelers (mostly because rapist QB) but credit where it’s due.

I had no idea Tomlin was so sassy, he always looks so stoic. I still hate his QB (barf) and the fact that he grew up a Dallas fan (barf) but I truly appreciate some good sass in football.