Oh the “I have a stuffy nose” face. I like your name for it more

I have this. Whatever you do, don’t line the handles up like they do in the photo. Spin it a little so they don’t line up. Your fingers will thank you.

I have this. Whatever you do, don’t line the handles up like they do in the photo. Spin it a little so they don’t…

Ohhh I like

I wonder if this is where GOOP got the idea for steaming vulvas...

Can we stop allowing old, white men from presiding over rape, assault, and abuse cases? If all women are going to be labeled as “someone asking for it” I feel that labeling old, white men “incapable of doing them justice” a perfectly reasonable rational.

To prevent my ass from being a spewing, angry, poop evacuation center, imma stick to almond milk

Jesus died for our* sins.

I'd like to see the terms and conditions to this contract Eve signed. We have got to be nearing the end of paying back her sin, no?

Are we sure Mac Miller isn’t her babysitter?

Awesome because I’m too tired to be mad on my behalf.

Apparently I’m some filthy pig

Ohhh good idea. I usually just pour some diluted bleach down the chute once a month as it’s just water in them.

The clanging of the straw against my glass of water does get annoying. The whole office knows when I’m getting a drink

Donethe same thing. You’re not alone

I have a little scrubby brush that cleans it and I only drink water through the straw.

I switched to metal straws after everyone made scrunchy faces over the plastic ones. Now everyone is making scrunchy faces over how there’s no way they can be hygienic. I just want to drink my water and keep my lipstick on my lips. Ya know?

Here’s a cookie and a napkin for the bloody nose you’re bound to get from that high horse.

And then a god grants them all this anti-LGBTQ money. Gotcha thanks ^_^

As they never make the news in my area except for the sister wives show, the impression that I get is while there are laws in place, so long as they stay under the radar they are free. But maybe I’m misinformed. My news cycles are still obsessing over kneeling athletes.

Would you be happier if I pluralized my statement? But thanks to reducing my post to your beef with my grammar.