Tim Burton movies are full of white people because Tim Burton is obsessed with that super pale-skinned/dark-haired vampirey aesthetic combined with the trappings of the English Victorian and Edwardian periods.

We have no idea what she might be plotting.

The most effective physics lesson I learned in high school was 100% practical. In tech theater (building and painting sets, mostly), I was using an electric drill to build a cabinet. After drilling in a screw, I thought I might have gone to deep, and rested my thumb on the head to check the depth.

Huh. What about a related phenomenon: one shoe abandoned by the side of the road? What horrifying, death-filled explanation could there be for all of them?

Oh, it depends on your 12 year old, of course. 12 was when I embarked on my vaguely emo phase, 15 was when I realized that music on the radio is sometimes ok, but the best music was not being played there. I guess that’s why I thought of that age range.

This one becomes less cute when you learn that the frosting was dyed with human blood.

“While fisherman report seeing a few dead bodies from failed migratory crossings before, this is by far the worst in the area”

I clicked play expecting hear some wince-inducing hipster deliberately-atonal bullshit.

Tin Ah Shay.

After it was corrected to Theroux, I misread the name as Trudeau and my fucking mind melted until I got my reading comprehension sorted out.

My bed is a mattress on a box spring on the floor. About two feet of height. I really like it! I never have to worry about my clothes or books migrating under the bed (yes, I’m messy). No habitat for dustbunnies. Is this acceptable for a grown woman with an apartment?

Pretty sure these were all items created to honor the goddess Anoia.

Taft 2012.

Everyone recc’ing Tana French is right but in the interest of providing some variety:

Whitman gets classed with school shooters, but I don’t think he should be, really. He was a married 25yo who killed his wife and mother before going up the tower.

Um, have you seen Hateful Eight, where basically 90% of the humor comes from watching the male characters punch Jennifer Jason Leigh in the face, and then their last meaningful act is to hang her?

My dad is a Trinity grad and he owns a “Miracle in Mississippi” t-shirt with that entire play diagrammed on the front.

Since no one else has answered your question (they were clearly distracted by the floof) I will say that while my local radio stations seem to determined to make the song of the summer Flo Rida’s”My House” by playing it every 2o minutes, I’ll cast a dissenting ballot for Chainsmokers “Closer”. I wouldn’t admit in…

I am addicted to McSweeneys and check it every tuesday and thursday at work. I read that piece when it came out and thought it was hilarious, I’m delighted to learn it was yours.

This is the premise for a kids movie inspired by The Prince and the Pauper, where each child spends a few days with the wrong family, experiences wacky hijinks, and eventually learns that deep down, they really do love their parents. Cue tearful reunion scene.