In a similarly likely alternate universe, Samus is hot and real and my girlfriend.

This article reminds me that I can’t use my real name in Madden and FIFA games because it flags it as inappropriate. I have never seen an insult that comes close to my name, at least not in the languages that I (barely) speak. And is a somewhat common last name in Spain, the country where football (soccer) is like a…

For international readers unfamiliar with scatalogical grading scales, “Bullshit” refers to something terrible and low quality, but “Batshit” refers to something crazy and insane. “Shit” refers to something bad and “The Shit” refers to something exceptionally good.

Great, now I’m hornier. 

You know why there is an anti-fat bias in medicine? Because we have plenty of studies showing being obese puts you at a higher risk for all sorts of dieses and mortality. This isn’t a theory, it’s a solid fact and if the fact that COVID killed obese people at a much higher rate isn’t enough to make that clear I don’t…

No your not missing anything, there is a reason it’s called Gender Dysphoria. It’s being shoved down children’s throats and it becoming “cool” to identify as such, like wanting to be an Astronaut or Fire Fighter. Studies show that almost all of them will grow out of it and be normal, unless it’s pushed by their…

While I do agree that the trailer is awesome (and sooo much better than the previous one), as a foreigner with next to no concept of the Super Bowl, I must insist that further mentions of it on this website use the variant Superb Owl.

Are we going to see the video or did he die for nothing?

Listen buddy, I saw a copy of Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney on the shelf at a game shop years ago. I didn’t buy it but let me tell you, looking at the cover picture taught me a lot about the legals and the briefs, so I think I’m qualified to say that this is a clear-cut win for the claim-man against the bad-team, for a…

I can’t wait to rent it from Blockbuster!

I look at that big black monolith and my brain instantly adds in...

If you look there at the side of the PS4, you’ll understand why I feel like consoles really should be looking more like mini PCs than they do. I’m not a Microsoft guy, but goddamn if this big ass pillar isn’t a breath of fresh air after 15 years of losing consoles to cooling issues.

I think people outside of the game-o-sphere are more used to this kind of naming convention than they’re getting credit for. High-end machine has “X” designation, lower end machine has “S” designation, with Microsoft having ditched the middle of the road option this go-round, at least for the time being.

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To do everything QAnon ever wanted, in one moment
Would you derail it, or just end short of the ship?

Yo! His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There’s vomit on his sweater already: Mom’s spaghetti
He’s nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To sink…

Or watching sports instead of playing sports!

BUY A DEER AND RIDE IT AS A SHOW OF DOMINANCE TO OTHER DEER

You’re getting rescued from the grays for this comment, and you’ll have to live with that forever.

There’s just so much here. Part of the reason this situation feels so odd and unprecedented is because, as the letter alludes to, this is an extremely nuanced situation that is being handled in the court of public opinion- a court that is famously bad at handling nuance.

I know I’ll be buried in the grays but nevertheless: I don’t give a damn about the X-Men, Disney give me Star Wars theatrical version in Blu-Ray please!!!!!

“plot armor”. I like that.