Sure, why not.

tell my husband, you know the guy I’m married to - and his response? “Girl you still got it!”

Why did you say that now I actually looked at it what the hell is going on with his toes

If Steven Tyler is sweeping me off my feet then something has gone horribly, horribly wrong in my life.

Also, secret rooms.

Buy a whole block, connect all the houses with giant hamster tunnels.

a print out titled “Media Myths of the Homosexual-Transgender Agenda” which, among other things, claims that being gay is bad for your health.

Well there’s also the fact that a sizable chunk of the people I have to interact with offline seem to think jokes about domestic abuse are hilarious, lusting after girls who look “almost legal” is perfectly acceptable, and sexually active women need to be shamed and mocked behind their backs so I’m not super sure…

Love of my life, you say?

That’s the sort of face that you want to punch, but you’re kind of reluctant to because you imagine his cheek just sucking your hand in up to the wrist and you have to fight to pull it back out with a loud shplorp noise. And it would come out strangely slimy.

Shut up, Sean.

I hate that no one I interact with outside the internet knows what mansplaining is so I can’t ever use this joke.

I never know why I even bother trying online dating seeing as I live in the fifth least populous state in the country and the nearest profiles that come anywhere close to matching my criteria are either at least two states away or in Canada.

I just got home from a nine-hour shift at work, where we had to deal with all the people wanting to eat after the three games in town got out.

So, between this and yesterday’s article, the impression I’m getting is that this school’s administrators are just straight up evil.

Really, hasn’t Rwanda been through enough?

Same. Hasn’t failed me yet.