OTOH, please keep obnoxious Yelp influencers trying to score free meals in exchange for “exposure” and Yelp bandwagon foodies out of the best restaurants, thank you.

Chances are every Executive office occupant probably walked away with some number of classified documents, as a matter of course.

I eat spam about twice a year. Once I switched to Spam Lite, I can’t eat regular because it tastes way too salty.

Every time someone brings up the topic of grilled cheese sandwiches, My hackles get riled up and I’m thrown back to 2006 and that terrible, burned sandwich Andi’s boyfriend Nate (who’s supposedly a chef) makes for her. And then he proceeds to guilt her about how expensive the cheese was instead of listening to her…

...they do not “condone any form of getting caught using any form of racism in their schools and community.”

1997 Toyota Tercel (this color, actually). I got t-boned in my Geo Storm (still my favorite car ever, don’t judge) and needed something fast to get to my job as a grocery clerk. This was the newest, lowest mileage car I could afford. It was reliable, but did absolutely nothing memorable: acceleration, braking,…

I do have a tendency to ramble...but not while I’m in the checkout lines!

Good lord no, please. I don’t want to exchange pleasantries with some MAGA or church lady clerk while they tell me how nice my bananas look while they fumble to find the PLU code (it’s 4011, BTW), or be stuck behind someone else who does.

Last of the big V-8's? Kick it in the guts, Barry!

I’m afraid this means Trump is going to skate, because “it wouldn’t be fair to prosecute him and not Biden” even though the circumstances are 100% different.  

John Waters did it first, with Odorama in 1981.

I guess most of them were technically mannequins, but this head should mean that Tourist Trap qualifies, right?

My favorite way to eat tinned fish is right out of the can, with a crab fork.

It doesn’t matter if you’re the fastest growing company in an industry, if you miss your targets by 20%, people who make investments based on your projections will not be happy about it.

Everyone like Thomas, Chapelle, Owens, most of the athletes...that are still doing what they did before they were “cancelled” haven’t been cancelled. Chapelle still tours, Owens still makes appearances, Thomas still sits on the bench; suffering mild, temporary inconvenience or having to put out a tepid non-apology =/=…

Nice. Now find *her*.

I don’t care how far he gets, as long as he goes.

How soon until we’ll get the same Tweet from Musk on Mars?

(includes 3 sets of earbuds)