The guy who thinks you stop jerking off at 50 is like 18 max right? Man, what a stupid question.

sharp, as always.

Okay, but... you understand that the whole movie is about how every single Avenger’s personal flaws led to Thanos’ triumph, right?

yes.

The funny thing is, if a black person works their ass off to get into a school, racists will yell about affirmative action. MEANWHILE.........

TEAM CHOCOLATE MILK 4 EVA!

Let he who hasn’t wrestled his wife to the ground because she won’t let go of his phone cast the first stone.

Keto was so 2018.  I'm doing the Rigo-morti™ diet 

You can pry my bread and tortillas from my cold dead hands. Bury me in burritos.

Because this post is meant to highlight the ways Oscar is making baby steps toward inclusion and diversity (despite Green Book taking the top award) by making many firsts and/or ‘just a fews’ in its winners tonight. Olivia Colman was a wonderful, well-deserved surprise and a raucously delightful speech, but it wasn’t…

The thing is, people (myself included) comment on this on almost every good/bad/ugly post and it never changes. Why? WHY? 

This is my eternal gripe with these posts. I love everything about it except that the captions are out of order and that confuses me if I don’t know who the people are. 

The order of the photos should match the order of descriptions because that is how captions have worked since captions were invented. 

I love these posts and I look forward to them so much! I wish that the order of the pictures would match the order of the descriptions in the paragraphs because I am Out Of Touch and I don't always know who everyone is.

“...but the best sex... is lewd; it’s loud, and, most specifically, leaves little to no room for sensuality.”

“It is triggered easily by things, like putting a quarter in a vending machine.”

You want Florida to get...more drunk!?

So I should karate chop you in the genitals, is what you’re saying?

Acts of atonement are fine and wonderful. If those acts of atonement involve direct contact with populations they’ve abused in the past, people also have a right to be cautious and ensure rehabilitation has fully happened before supporting them. No one would raise flags if Tyler started a charity to protect endangered…

He doesn’t owe us an explanation.