this came from my hungover brain, I’ll have you know :)

Old cars suck! They’re dangerous and bad for the environment. They’re also always worse driving than I remembered. These days, whenever I get into an older car they feel so damn loud and slow. They should be relegated to the garage and left off the streets.

Gas taxes should be higher. Like, much higher.

This has nothing to do with the god damn Germans! 

If only Subaru had continued the development of the baja...

Nah, Matt Gaetz probably has something fancier than a Santa Fe.

“and there was said to be some damage to the Hyundai’s windshield after breaking through the arm at the exit of the drawbridge.”

Maybe they were on a mission from God to save an orphanage through a charity concert hosted by their old band.

Are the cops gonna do something about the, you know, Mexican drug cartel that seems to have set up shop in their town? Maybe they’re paying off all the right folks.

The part that I’m laughing at is, even a HS coach knows where the bad guys are.. and yet... the police don’t?.. and arrest the coach and not the cartel?

I'm really, really excited to be NOT going.

“Imagine if German developers created a video game glorifying the “heroic” sacrifice of German soldiers who were killing allied forces who were there to LIBERATE an entire continent from Germany’s invasion and massacre of jews.”

Lots of variables, including if it’ll pass inspection or be up to code, but if it were me I’d leave that and expect it to be a negotiating point.  Realtors make a habit of always finding stuff to ask for $$ off or credits, no sense in fixing the electrical box only for them to find something else, let that get rolled…

Did you watch the video? I’m pretty sure she’s something other than a white woman.

Do not do any upgrades if you try to sell a house. It is a waste of money. You will never get it back. If you want to do remodel do it for yourself not for other people. And do things that YOU want and make your life easier, not things that you think other people will want years down the line but you will hate for all…

Or the old joke about Nixon getting an asshole transplant, and the asshole rejecting him.

“I’m Ernest Hemingway and now I am going to eat this cat.”

He just looks like that...

Hi, I’m your guidance councilor. If your name’s Taylour Paige; your place in the adult entertainment industry is pretty much assured.

*So loud I could hear three weeks later