He’s not eating it! He’s showing off how huge it is. It’s that big, man! A big ol’ burrito!

He’s describing the size of the dog his son tortured to death.

He’s eating it from the middle! It can’t be a burrito. Corn on the cob, maybe. Unless Huckabee is terrible at charades...

You’re right about 2008, particularly about Huckabee’s since-abandoned Christianity-based advocacy for the poor (although I disagree that he was seriously seeking office; he’d have been glad to win it, of course, but he was still out here freeballin’).

Exceedingly fair. Getting mad at him almost makes him seem legitimate, and no one needs that. He’s one of the more vile, vindictive politicians I’ve ever had the displeasure to encounter.

This is all true. Except 2008 was different. He actually ran for president, and talked about the “good” Christianity stuff, like caring for the poor. Seriously! Look it up! He was way more reasonable in 2008. But that don’t fly at Fox, so he dropped that schtick and went with the “you’re all going to hell” stuff. And…

Well, I’m a Californian, but I lived there for eight years. There’s a strange love/hate going on with Huck, sort of the right’s version of Bill Clinton in a way I guess.

I know, I know. I really just can’t get mad at the guy! I’m disgusted by virtually everything he professes to stand for, but for all that it matters he might just as well be Jerry Springer.

FYI, after consulting with my editor and colleague Rob Harvilla, we have determined that the specific charade Mike Huckabee is performing in the photo at top is “a really big burrito.”

As an Arkansan don’t you already get those on a daily basis?

Former SOS Hillary Clinton will be indicted just as soon as dubyah and Dickand Zombie Ronny Raygun get indicted. Please proceed.

Yeah, I agree with Captain_Crutch — there’s no gun to your head forcing you to make the Sophie’s choice of Cruz or Rubio (or Trump?).

I feel like this was purposely concise so as to align with how simple and nakedly opportunist Huckabee is, but man, as a former Arkansan, was I ever jonesing for heaping helping of personal attacks and jokes.

If you hate voting as a conservative then please, by all means, stop doing so. Win-win.

i couldn’t run my normal route on saturday because the Department of Homeland Security Theater was took over a waterfront park for a “COMMAND CENTER”

That was what struck me; the article was no big surprise. The comparison that came to my mind, though, was Fallout. I’m trudging through a post-apocalyptic wasteland, being attacked mutants twice my size and gangs of raiders that outnumber me 5-1. Yet the cops doing security when a damned game is nearly a week away is…

Can we talk about how fucked-up and dystopian it is to see a police officer decked out like a fucking Counterstrike cosplayer and armed like he’s ready to singlehandedly occupy a Central American nation, and consider that the norm? I know how we got here, but still, fuck. Where will we be a decade from now? Robocop?

By charging the NFL.

The joke of course is that 4.5 million is sofa cushion money for the mega-conglomerate that is the NFL. Each of the 32 owners, among the richest people in the world, would need to contribute roughly $140,000 to pay the city for providing all the security and travel. But no, they won't even ask. Better to take it from…

NFL now taking notes from the Olympic Committee on dumping debt to host cities.