All I can picture is my kid’s Disney Princess potty seat, and although it’s safe to say I’m not in this guy’s target demo anyhow, this mental image is REALLY not doing it for me.

Yeah, and I picture him looking out his window and just seething at the cop he called playing with the guys and then leaving them in peace instead of punishing them for being loud (outside) and rowdy (black).

A friend played high school football in Texas and played thru concussions too. After the last concussion, he began to suffer migraines and memory issues he still has today. He’s only in his mid-twenties. It’s a scary thing.

I’m sure I’m not the only gray to say this, but you spelled “twats” wrong.

Now I need to know what grade you teach, bc you’re either the greatest teacher ever or truly depraved.

The argument for shade is that it comes immediately after listing the other former cast members’ achievements. But agreed, it’s a confusing one.

Does that count as shade? Bc it killed me too and I don’t know if that’s the right word for it. Where’s Kara when you need her?!!!

Yep, for sure. I’m not a Bills fan, but you gotta admire their perseverance despite extreme cold, total inebriation and a certain lack of aesthetic appeal. (Or maybe you don't.)

Oh, for sure! It’s so tacky to force unwitting strangers into watching you get down. I’d feel pretty grossed out (and probably a little violated) if I stumbled upon it myself. Leave me out of your sexy times, strangers!

NGL, the *idea* of sex in a public place is sometimes hot to me (depending on the place, of course), but I’ve never actually put it into practice. Bc with my luck I’d be the next person you’d see in a mocking Gawker article after being arrested for getting down in public. Not a good look for anyone.

Yep, both ouija and FC greatly involve the idiomotor reflex, I think it’s called. Basically, true believers don’t realize they’re the ones doing the actual communicating bc it happens unconsciously. Studies have shown it with both Ouija boards and with FC practitioners.

Yes, she definitely played both parents against each other when she was a teen, which wasn’t hard to do bc their relationship has always been fairly tense and acrimonious. Her dad was all too glad to swoop in and rescue her from “mean Mom” and her attempts to discipline her, and my sister would just fall apart. There…

It is. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not laying all the blame at the feet of Dad - my niece is a smart woman who obviously knew drinking and driving is wrong (and she wasn’t a superb driver at that age even while sober, so she didn’t need the extra handicap). But when someone’s prefrontal cortex isn’t fully developed and…

The same thing happened to my sister - my very bright, beautiful niece started to act like a “normal” teenager when she was about 15 (i.e., ignoring curfew, hanging out with people my sister didn’t approve of, dating seniors, etc), and ran to her permissive dad when my sister tried to lay down rules and discipline. It…

Damn.

Your kid is indeed awesome! My little one is a cool fighter too. She likes to be Leonardo from the ninja turtles. “Because he’s the leader!”

They’re not streaming anywhere, bc the universe is a cruel place. Wouldn’t be surprised if someone snuck them onto YouTube though. I’ve binged on a lot of old shows that way.

Goddammit. I don’t know you, but I’m thinking of you tonight, and your mom too, man. Hope the test is negative and you have a lot more years together. Truly, fuck cancer.

Watch Parks and Rec :)

I moved from The Big City to a small town to finish high school, and I can cosign. My mom used to say “you can’t take a shit around here without everyone in town knowing what color it is.” Crude, but barely an exaggeration.