and found dead a day later. I’m not typically one for conspiracies but wow is this ripe with suspicion 

Stallions have dicks right?

Whoppers have been letting me down so hard the last few times i have indulged which is sad because i used to think of it as the best flagship burger of the big chains.

it’s just a canned vodka/soda isn’t it?

holy shit that’s good. 

i like it. That doesn’t make it a good film.

This thing is playing out like true detective 

The untouchables was on tv last night. putting aside the fact that it’s not a good movie, i realized that Donald Trump’s entire persona is him doing an impression of Robert DeNiro playing Al Capone. The hand gestures, the cartoon swagger.

can confirm- wife detests it but is super comfortable 

it just reminds me of this:

it looks like he put a fake beard on with faceapp 

I’ve always been hot and cold with vettes but this thing looks beautiful and under $60k? fuggadaboutit

“I hear he was trying to have sex with his daughter. You’re asking me a question about it. I don’t know, but I’m sure there’s somebody who will be looking at that, “

I watched a Nuremberg rally in colour last night

driving on a beach seems like such a dick move in 2019 

This movie reminds me of the summer of my first heartbreak when my gf went to summer camp and dumped me over the phone for her waterski instructor, which coincidentally sounds like a plot line from American Pie.

ILS - Invisible Lat Syndrome

My ex and i broke up and i found myself making a microwave butter chicken.

you gotta be some kind of idiot to pull a gun out at this kind of event (or anywhere but let’s park that for the moment)

it would most likely be smaller.