That’s what I’m saying to you.

It isn’t! Never has someone so obviously talented (Bruno Mars) had so many bland fucking boring pop songs.

He has a hurt ankle, not any known cardiac problems.

Pretty sure.

I don’t care if he kicks people, I like him.

“A short feature.”

The Knicks are lame as fuck but Porzingis is fun and great.

“I’m going to threaten that very large man with a BB gun at close quarters.”

Man, when those afterburners kicked in it was over....

I’m goin’ goin’ back to Cali Cali.

The only things that makes my head hurt more than this title are Yankee Candle scents.

It’ll be underwater in twenty minutes anyway.

Counterpoint: Carmelo isn’t even in the top 10-15 best NBA players.

Dashcam recommendations?

That’s scientifically inaccurate. Like black holes with light, no fists escape Ted Cruz’s face.

I’m glad I’m not the only one who raised an eyebrow at that.

Good dog!

See? He’s a time traveling demolitionist who doesn’t care who he hurts. This scene obviously takes place in 2018 Washington D.C.

The Warriors are one of the few things saving me from crippling depression brought on by the otherwise incredible lack of good in the world.

When I was a lad of sixteen I went hunting one morning with some family members. It was -5, but thankfully the air was mostly still. Sitting in the woods that morning before the sun came up convinced me that, you know, it probably wasn’t worth it.