When you say hard thighs do you mean thighs of a teenaged instagram star? You know, hotdog legs. Because I have legs I would describe as meaty but if we’re using muscle tone to mean hard, thats what I have. Like my boyfriend once commented “She-Hulk in the building!” when I was wearing a dress and a pair of pretty…

Is it though? I am one part of my heritage. I’m not all parts. Its part of my genetic code but its not a part of me. I’d rather live in a world where you are where you are and you don’t bring up random facts to suit your situation.

Nope. You’re either white or you’re cherokee. Its just being a good person.

I could go down to the firesafe and give you actual information but I think you’ll just trust me on the stuff I’ve gone through. There were actual sourced from so many official government sanctioned things they found, I didn’t go through them because it was too painful at the time and honestly going through it now…

As someone who is a member of one and there are sketchy details on the other, I gotta tell you I prefer the DAR. Better sandwiches. Also, does your boss know that its just a giant money and time suck and half of the people suck? Some are so cool but anyone named after an animal has a 60% chance of sucking.

I was 100% white as far as I knew until I was like 12. Like legacy member to Daughters of the Revolution white. Then I guess like all rich old white people, retirement gets super boring. My grandparents decided to get really into genealogy and it got real crazy real quick. A decade later they were leaders of a…

Is this family you live with or a family that you have created? Because if you have kids and you can describe them as “messy ass” and this is all the stuff you have to do, be a pal and institute chores.

I work in advertisement and I honestly think that fitness is sold to women wrong. Yeah, if you’re selling quick fixes and unicorn dreams, sure okay go the shame route. That makes sense. Like if your entire market is women who hate themselves, pile on the hate rhetoric. Little Clemantis has to get her private school…

I feel like we’re getting precariously close to the point where this goes from oh god this is so sad and ugh this fuck to OH THIS FUCK? Like theres been a lot of heat today for this rusty leaf blower full of nails and I can sense a half assed suicide attempt brewing.

And its so much more expensive there! Plus its a total surprise of what you’ll actually get. You don’t get to see the actual slabs that you’re picking so you have no clue what you’re getting. I seriously love walking around the yard to pick out the slab I want for my project

Lowes! GO TO LOWES! Clearance rack. Seriously. I’ve spent like 1/4 of what I wanted to spend on my yard and I’ve gotten straight up four times more than I ever thought I could afford

Well, that seals the deal. I will no longer be shopping at home depot. I mean, I didn’t like to begin with. My local home depot is always suspiciously empty and the people working there ask if you need any help in both an I’m going to murder you way but also I’m so bored can I help you with whatever murder you are…

In college I was super busy with my actual major and the stuff I was doing outside of classes for it while being a business minor. It was a lot and one of my professors for business suggested why not do tourism business in the hotel retail tourism management vein and I said sure that sounds like I might be able to…

The legal disclaimer before and after the show would be amazing. HGTV does not reccomend this this is just for entertainment purposes. If you do decide to do this and something goes horribly horribly wrong, you can’t sue us. Seriously. You can’t. Because we said so.

Well, I wouldn’t buy a house where they all congregate. If you’re gonna use bad people’s action for financial gain, I’d say if you were planning on staying in the house for a decade or two, find the least violent and oldest one in a nice neighborhood where theres only one offender, buy the house for cheap, use your…

I can just see them waiting until this quiets down a little bit then suing the guys for assault and some dumb legalesse that their assault caused his future income to be drastically impacted. Its the worst idea ever. But that seems to be their wheelhouse.

Did you know that if a sex offender lives within .1 mile, property values decrease 4%? Is public safety worth having a rich peoples property values drop 4%?

I pray that they try and sue the two guys who intervened for assault. I PRAY

Dummy Daddy Turner isn’t even trying to use logic here. Lets say that he really does believe having his convicted rapist son on college campuses is a good idea. Like he’s the vineyard vines Scared Straight one man show.

I mean, if Tyga wants to throw stones from his dishwasher box under the 405, he can. She seems almost resonable if her adderall hasn’t worn off. She’ll only talk about him owing her $1.75 mil instead of 2. Didn’t we just hear yesterday that he owes her $2 million but omg it was a gift, y’all!