Let’s see, off the top of my head:

Let’s not forget Ted Cruz either, whose father bribed custom officials to get him the stamp he needed on his passport so he could enter the U.S. which he couldn’t get otherwise because of that whole “being on the communist side of the fight” problem. But his path to citizenship is apparently an uplifting moral origin…

It’s because the 10-year-old in Jen’s womb is ready to emerge, at last. She’s been waiting on that baby to arrive forever.

Only the Republican party can simultaneously scream about bootstraps and then tear a person(*cough* woman) down for using them.....if they are from the wrong party, of course.

Oh, oh, oh, that reminds me of when he talked about immigration. He said with a sneer on his face about how people come to this country from other places and railed against tighter security at the borders. His own father, a Fidel Castro supporter and party member, fled Cuba after things went south for him. So let me…

Oh, hey, you could have something there!

Look, my parent’s cocker spaniel is a damn evil mastermind. She is the brains we need behind a baby sloth presidency and you also get a uterus on the ticket to bring the lady-vote. I think we could win this thing.

Here’s my take down of the final question:

It was terrible. Trump basically admitted he had no problem disrespecting women. The things said about abortion are horrifying. We all hate Walker even more here. Huckabee is transphobic as hell.

“She appears to be a great mom; she is taking care of the baby.”

Thank you. I couldn’t find a place. This is apparently the place. THANK YOU.

I really needed this sloth after that shit show. The lies, the fucking lies those people told. It’s staggeringly incredible they ended the show with talking about God. If they really believed in God, they would be terrified of bursting in to flames after their outright bearing false witness, coveting, and having no…

Well, I guess by definition, a sloth is always living in sin...

And I just feel like 21 is so young to have a child. Hershey was finishing up her bachelor’s and had dreams of getting her PhD by 30. So much for the 10 year plan.

Is Carlos maybe a little old for Hershey? Has he at least married her? I HAVE QUESTIONS.

I’d vote for baby sloth over Mike Huckabee.

She also ate all my Cheerios.

Why not both:

Bootstraps, right? Isn't that the correct answer? Or is it free market? My ladybrain confuses these things.

Thanks! I'll probably have to wait until I get home :) I'll watch the main event in all it's glorious fuckery!