I don’t know if I’d go that far. He probably has some defenses. I mean is “spilling wine” a strict liability tort? 

I can’t hear “there ought to be a law” without thinking...

I think we need to recognize the opposite of paying it forward. Like just-suck-it-up-and-be-cool forward.

It may be a nitpick, but how exactly is “get as much done in advance” a not-to-do?

TIL: that there is a rapper named “Earl Sweatshirt.”

Isn’t that just Lisa as a baby? I assume Lisa was a baby at some point and all babies look basically the same. Furthermore, Maggie wears a blue bow, not a yellow bow.

The name Piper Perabo is in the news.

I don’t think you truly understand. This is an abomination. Some guy can’t watch movies on the rectangle in his pocket at the video quality that he DEMANDS. How can it be called “on demand” if I demand something and don’t get it?

McCloud!

Keep your #$%^ing mouth shut about Pink Ladies.

Little Fuddruckers is destined to be the Mayor of Miracle Whip.

I’m not going to pick a side until Payton Manning weighs in on this....

I hope a rival chicken chain offers the kid $12,000 to change his name to Popeye.

Not Penny’s bot.

I would love to pretend my taste in 1998 was uber-sophisticated and that my favorite pop culture memory was watching The Thin Red Line or listening to The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill. But I was 8, and those things didn’t enter my life until later on.

**cries and masturbates**

And it turned out a couple of bangers in the process.

Bloody slaughter.

Rocky Road Head!