You do see someone rocking this look, fucking run dude...they are one bad day from raising hell....

These fucking assholes. Anytime somebody proposes raising a hotel tax to support, say, public education, or some other social service, the casinos and the chamber-of-commerce types and the knee-jerk anti-all-taxes-all-the-time types shout out that doing so will CRUSH the poor underdog tourism industry in our poor…

These people are running it into the ground. Talk about beating a dead gorilla.

The coach actually learned those moves while working at the Ulaanbaatar Chippendales.

FINALLY, some homoeroticism while I’m trying to watch Men’s Roman-Greco wrestling.

In a certain way, this is worse than a transgression of more “substance.” Like, if an athlete murders someone, nobody in their right mind thinks “typical American, murdering people and such.” It’s a personal disgrace, but not really a national one.

On the other hand, as an international representative of the nation,…

Bears invent river tubing as leisure activity; spontaneously develop cut-off jean shorts and love of light beer. Bear mullets to follow.

The paper clips should be fine, but I would avoid eating the pens and pencils.

When dad came home from a long trip but didn’t bring gifts.

It’s traumatic to be out late with your friends in a foreign country - with a language barrier - and have a stranger point a gun at your and demand money to let you leave

“I don’t mind typing this up for you, but for God’s sake would you at least stop PEEING ON ME while I type?”

Or, a Wednesday.

I smell a reboot - “What Would Ryan Lochte Rue?”

Police: If you donate to a charity, we’ll let you go.

The reason why Lochte’s lying isn’t trivial, even if, or especially if, Rio’s criminal justice system is corrupt, like, say, Chicago’s, is that when prominent celebrities report being victims of a violent crime, an embarassed police force can often decide to make a collar, without such niceties as having found the…

It’s a shame. This guy had such a bright future as a former swimmer.

Occam’s Razor, bitches!

The greatest trick the devil ever played is convincing the world he probably ate a lot of paste.

This could make an endearing Campbell’s soup campaign, no?