Furiously downloading the SeekingArrangement app.

Attitude is everything. I remember I once saw my Quarterbacks head drop, just for a second, during a game. That second was enough, it was like a virus that infected the entire team. I just dropped my controller and walked away from the xbox.

The intern putting together the 75 second highlight of the Nets 2016-2017 season for the YES Network now has a game to clip from.

That’s great for Russell Westbrook but Mike Trout is still the superior hitter by nearly every advanced metric

Love looks like a kid who got an A on his report card and can’t understand why mommy is yelling at daddy.

I had the right intentions in my mind, but I had the wrong intentions come out of my mouth. I take full responsibility for that as the leader of the team.

Oh sure, I bet you think all CEOs look alike.

What a self-absorbed guy, thinking he should have everything. It’s like he’s repeatedly heard people say, “It’s all Cravy.” Next thing you know, he’ll be demanding his own train.

I new that girl, two.

More like Pfffttt Auto.

That’s pretty good tbh

“This game would be a lot more fun with teammates”

God, I love that one. Because you don’t truly understand that sexual assault is bad until you have a daughter. I know I was all, “Rape for everyone!” Then I had a little girl and now I’m all, “Maybe rape isn’t great!”

I know the Rockets are chic right now, but I still can’t enjoy them. Harden’s maddening–but effective!–game is the chief reason.

They rape you at Taco Bell?

Which is hilarious, because Sarah Palin is only shitting on Kaep for attention.

He’ll end up as second in line to Sam Bradford, who then gets broken in half due to being Sam Bradford, will start 10 games and get us to the Superbowl.

Bastian, how many dongs do you think you’ll ding at the Superbowl Cup Finals?

I don’t know Lonzo, but this goes for all kids: Don’t let your parents make you think you owe them. If you appreciate what they did and want to thank them, that’s fine, but it’s your life. Live for you, not for them.