The guy has got "maximum rookie contract" speed.

The SOUTH did rise again!! ON REPLAY!

Bless their hearts.

Burn in hay-ell

Looking to keep Palmer safe from Rice, authorities have sequestered her in a local McDonald's ball pit

too late

My mother-in-law stayed with us after my son was born for about two weeks. After a few days, I realized that she has absolutely no sense of humor at all. She actually asked a clerk in a store for '"extra leaky" diapers because I had jokingly requested them.

My mother-in-law is a nurse in an obstetrics ward. She would be totally fine with that response.

"I beg to differ. The perfect friendship is one in which you relentlessly hurl homophobic and racial slurs at your friend, while at the same time verbally depicting graphic rape fantasies involving his sister."

Neither does Hong Kong, American Samoa, or Micronesia but they are also represented by the IOC.

Meanwhile, journalists in the US have mistakenly overrun the Sam's Club in Columbia, MO hoping to interview patrons about being gay in the SEC

Ironically the Winter Olympics is about the one time we try to prove that were better then the rest of the world at something (we don't say it out loud, but you know were thinking it).

What better way to tie it than with a bow?

Or Joe Gibbs.

... chuckleheads who wanted to argue that Michael Sam coming out "isn't news," ...

God damn god damn god damn god DAMN that was a great game!

I only make simple snacks for the Super Bowl and plan on making nachos and tacos this year. However I plan on cooking up a storm on Saturday for the other big game this weekend

Usually it's chili, but the bar I always go to will have free pizza. So pizza it will be.

QUESO! And we're probably going to order pizza or something? I'd actually kind of totally forgotten that the Super Bowl was Sunday because I'm a terrible football fan. Oops.

"Fuck workers!!!"