vladimirpoutine
VladimirPoutine
vladimirpoutine
Sep 24 2014
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I would be a Hufflepuff, which I am down with, but I do not enjoy wearing yellow. Good thing the robes are mostly black!

Sep 15 2014
112

My mother on premarital sex said "You wouldn't buy a car with out test driving a few first!!" Our mothers are really into making sure we have good transportation.

Sep 5 2014
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I just drank the leftover cherry vodka from my birthday, straight. Tastes like cough medicine yeee hooo

Sep 5 2014
1

You were describing me until you got to the facial hair part. Then I realized I lack the parts you desire. Our Jezebel love story was not meant to be!

Sep 4 2014
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I'm similar, I just don't really care either way. I don't think there is a god but if there is I don't care. I call myself an "apathetic atheist."

Aug 30 2014
1

I would LOVE one of those in just egg white version. For some reason I cant stand the texture of hard boiled egg yolks. I like yolks either runny or mixed with the whites but not solid by themselves. I would add hard boiled whites to so many things tho!!! I feel wasteful throwing out the yolk so I never make them.

Aug 30 2014
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I like it better than taking turns because if I'm just giving a regular bj I get really bored and if he is just going down I feel like I'm under pressure because I take so long to get off. Plus I multitask in everything in my life, why not sex! A+ to 69!

Aug 27 2014
1

Oooo I make almost exact same breakfast all the time (except for dinner, I don't eat breakfast) but replace the cauliflower with diced sweet potato. I will have to try it with cauliflower!

Aug 21 2014
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I tried watching youtube hypnotize videos to make me like exercising and get off my ass even when I don't want to. No luck so far. Sat on my butt and thought about it a bit...

Aug 18 2014
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I recently told my dentist I prefer going to the gynecologist over seeing her because of that awful sand toothpaste and she laughed :( ITS THE TRUTH

Aug 13 2014
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If you have ever shared an apartment wall with a smoker the smell comes through and makes your apartment stink and the e-cigs do not do this. So I think that is a valid point to make even if he never smoked/vaped around other people. Read more

Aug 12 2014
1

I shave my arms but I have so little in the first place its like 2 swipes of a razor and it is gone. I only it about twice a month though, my arm hair seems to grow very slowly (I wish my leg hair was like that )

Aug 12 2014
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My mom made me wear hippie tea tree patchouli deodorant in high school because she believed this was true :( I played SPORTS. I needed ANTIPERSPIRANT

Aug 11 2014
1

My dad was directing me to his new place in the middle of nowhere NY and part of his instructions were "take the left fork by the giant hot dog"

Aug 9 2014
1

I ate Korean food and now I am sitting around on the internet trying to make money off of horny men because I have boobs. #misandry?