Maybe if they’re like fancy cleaning supplies? Like I never spring for Mrs Meyers laundry detergent but finding it in a gift bucket would be super fun.

As someone who has a weird fascination with cleaning tools and cleaning supplies, I probably would have liked your moms gift, but I am weird as hell.

OMG my mom does this with clothes. I’m thirty-fucking-four and she hasn’t bought me clothes in well over a decade, but when she sees me in a nice sweater or pair of jeans, she asks if she bought that for me and acts like I’d be naked without her generosity. Yes, Mom, you bought me clothes when I was a CHILD, and when…

Agreed! At least a small decorative candle I could put on a bookshelf or in my bathroom and forget about, but what do you do with a candle the size of a coffee can???

I feel like if you ask for people to come from a long way away then you shouldn’t expect a gift. People are not made of money.

You invited someone to your wedding and then set them up to fail because you don’t like that they don’t want to purchase the $300 Kitchenaid and everything left on the registry—the one that you, by the way, set up—is inexpensive?

Have fun with that.

CANDLES ARE THE WORST why are candles a thing this isn't fucking 1066.

Wow. Maybe you could have skipped the tour of Europe and wedding all together, then bought all that stuff off your registry yourself so that you didn’t have to deal with all those assholes you hate drinking all of *your* liquor.

Yes. This. My mother in-law makes latch hook and cross stitch projects. And she smokes while she's doing it. She gives these away as gifts. I feel so bad for the bride and groom when they open that. I imagine that the cigarette cloud kills them pretty quickly though.

*gets on soapbox*

You are not owed a gift. Ever. For any occasion.

Eh, I think if people have to travel for your wedding they’re 100% off the hook when it comes to buying a gift. Writing out a card is fine.

Worst wedding gift: A crystal wedding cake topper, given to us at the wedding.

I have a standard off-registry gift that I give to everyone:

The latter part about trying to come on your honeymoon is weird, but if a person has to spend a significant amount just to be there, they are double not obligated to get you a gift. It’s nice if it is in their means to do both, but if not, it doesn’t make them an asshole.

Yeah, any off-registry kitchen item *cough*breadmaker*cough*.. AVOID!

OMG my fiance and I just got that manual from his family priest! Along with a card reminding us about the importance of procreation. Boy howdy, was that a difficult thank-you note to write.

A friend gave me a gift card to a sex shop as a wedding present and it was like a breathe of fresh air among a sea of horrendous silver platters and fucking icons of goddamn jesus that I sure as shit never registered for.

You’re totally right. She was shocked to learn that I didn’t like being embarrassed after she cracked jokes about our “drama” (aka her physical abuse) of me during her wedding toast.

No she wouldn’t have. She sounds like the type of person who could be visiting you in your house constructed entirely of modern art and still buy you a renaissance painting.