Yeah, dude. I pretty much exclusively shop alone now. It's so much more relaxing and fun.

I was lucky in that I had a sympathetic father, who knew the best way to go about this was to just cut my mother out of the process. They're together and all, and they get along quite well, but he knows how her crazy manifests all over me. She's like a volcano of crazy, dressed in Ann Taylor, waving a glass of Pinot…

I think this is pretty good advice.

Thank you.

And now I'm remembering that I did not take my mother prom dress shopping. I went to Saks and bought a backless red silk gown, and told her to eat a bag if dicks when she said I looked like a slut.

My mom had absolutely no boobs, whereas I had enormous boobs, and this led to a whole host of problems when it came to close shopping, bra shopping, and getting dressed in general.

Thank you for reminding me of the mall-meltdowns I had with my mom during my teenage years. I will remember them, and you, when I go dress shopping.

Wow, I have dealt with some really gross stuff as a bartender, but at least the money is good and I can unabashedly tell people to fuck off.

nope

It's like, because guys like this have never been in trouble for ANYTHING in their entire lives, they can't understand it when they finally get punished for something they've done.

The complexity of the emotions involved is clearly lost on you.

I read on another website that it was Vandenberg's father who cried out after the verdict. He then stormed out of the courtroom.

That sounds realllly good

You just defined it.

My drunk friend ordered a bacon egg and cheese, and cream cheese, on a bagel, and it turned out to be goddamn delicious.

I'm not sure how it happened, but I have never dated this type of guy. Every one have them has been a generous tipper and pleasant dining companion.

There is nothing compelling you to be that guy. If you don't want to be that guy then YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE THAT GUY.

Hahaha, OMG Jezebel had a "worst period stories" contest a few years ago, and my story about my homemade pad falling out on the crowded subway platform was one of the winners. Oh, God, ohhhh... It's been thirteen years and I'm still embarrassed.

The restaurant has 1 lb. blocks of butter. Am I obligated to bring you a 1 lb. block of butter with your entree just because we have it?

I think that's the line for restaurant employees too.