Socks!? TO BED!? You disgust me.

I had an apartment neighbor many years ago that would have friends over frequently. Usually very low-key.

This absolutely confirms my strongly stated opinions that manbuns are NOT OKAY.

I kind of agree, why do liberals hate good things?

IT BELONGS IN A MUSEUM

dude, that shit is my jam. bad dancing is a lifestyle.

I really need to get a baking stone.

That’s what I do and it works great. I just couldn’t believe that magnets never occurred to me, given that I've got about 20 plain-old-round ones stuck on my fridge.

To be clear here, I have absolutely nothing to do with Gawker Media’s video strategy, and had to track down somebody at 10:30 at night to even ask if we were a part of YouTube Red or not.

If I’m paying 31 million buckaroos for my wedding, it must include Idris Elba interrupting the proceedings, declaring his everlasting love for me and marrying me on the spot while David Bowie sings “Life on Mars.” For starters.

Don’t have sex on a plane!

Like, nah dude, the bridesmaids don’t need your opinions about what we should wear. Go sit down somewhere.

manager: how do we target those jaded, cynical people aged 29-40 with this ad?

These poor fools will never know the joyous power that comes with being a long time vegan. For example I just reached level 37 veganhood. I can now materialize kale from the atmosphere and have taught the trees to speak my name.

Found this on FB a few days ago. Makes sense to me.

yeah that’s why I dated men in their fifties when I was in high school

So... this technology renders the vehicle safe to drive behind Volkswagens?

I’m not exactly believing of this but now I can only hear Charlie Daniels in my head.

The speaking fees these politicos charge in the 10s of thousands of dollars so, yes, it costs $110 to register, a “mere” $50 for students.