"I think your views are just as unworthy of respect because it is dishonest, grounded in superstition, preys on the credulous, and utterly untrue. Lies and beliefs that demand you abandon all reason are not worthy of respect.

My cat tries to eat me when I'm sleeping. I've actually woken to her taking test nibbles on my arm. It's kind of awkward when she notices I'm awake and just locks my gaze with part of my bicep held gingerly between her teeth (thankfully still attached to my arm. So I'm staring down a cat whose lips are pressed to…

Even though you made me snort so hard it hurt, you're so hearted.

Absolutely. Also want to add that when you stop in at the viewing or the funeral, PLEASE sign the register book. At the time of the services, the family and the bereaved are distracted and upset and overwhelmed, so they won't necessarily remember everyone who came to pay their respects and support them. After…

Oh good god, that was equal parts hilarious and terrifying because I can totally see myself in that situation and having the same thought process as him. Have you read "Let's Pretend This Never Happened" by Jenny Lawson (aka The Bloggess)? I actually honestly hurt myself laughing (I was wheezing so hard I thought I…

I'm intrigued by the fact that the only entree they offer is chicken finger based, and yet the first thing listed under "Extras" is. . .chicken finger. Get your chicken fingers with a side of chicken finger! That said, I'm kind of bummed they don't have these in my state. Anybody who's THAT dedicated to chicken…

Now that I'm out of the call center and in the crazy, wild world of the dismal trade, I can say with confidence that I much prefer crossing my legs and wistfully eying up the shrubbery at the edge of the cemetery than I do explaining my basic biological needs to management.

Ha, I once worked in an office like that. It was a call center, so of course our break-time/bathroom times were monitored and if we exceeded our allotted bathroom time or whatever, we had to fill out an "aux report" with an explanation of why we weren't spending that time on the phones with customers. Obviously they…

I do the noise thing too! I'm very dramatic about swatting the tp roll so it rattles and crinkling the paper towels after washing my hands (hand dryers are a bad idea in this scenario as the noise will mask the sound of the door as you exit, so the stall-captive will wonder if you're some perv who pretended to leave…

Laugh all you want, but when the Latrinus velciraptorus attacks you're going to want to have enough wind left in you to get the hell away!

We need to have, like, a telethon or something. To raise awareness.

I'm seeing plenty of shit-neuroses in the comments, but does anyone else deal with sympathy shit-neuroses? When I'm in a public loo and become aware that the occupant of the other stall is being suspiciously quiet and still, I get all panicky and hurry to finish all of my obligations as if there was a velociraptor…

Oh yes, I wholeheartedly second the requirement for professional reasons. All my life I've been pretty lax with makeup except eye liner/shadow. Now that I'm in the funerary profession, I HAVE to wear foundation, blush, and lipstick or else I belong in one of the showroom caskets. Not a fun moment when you look down…

Cool. But not everyone exercises with the express goal of being healthy, which was my point to the original commenter above who is calling out the "contradiction" of exercising and smoking.

That would make sense if her goal in exercising was to be healthy. But since she's probably exercising to stay skinny (with the added benefit of the stress relief that comes with exercise), the smoking is irrelevant (or even an aid in the skinny/taking the edge off factor).

Oh. Well, add this to the ever growing list of Things I'm Doing Wrong. Because I currently live in the heart of Flyers country, and if this little Norwegian-French Canadian hockey nut was watching sports just to make boys like me, I sure as hell shouldn't be talking up my (often unfortunate) die-hard allegiance to…

Ha, I'm so Nordic pale that half the time, I'm totally bleached out (eyes included) even without a flash. There's one bizarre picture of me that was taken indoors, no flash, and not a lot of light in the room, and I'm just a glowing human shape with dark hair and a tank top. I'd wonder if my soul keeps photobombing…

Just hover your cursor over their avatar for a few seconds and the option to heart will appear.

I'm guessing it was done in an open air MRI, and I'm only assuming that because I can't for the life of me imagine how it would be possible in the tiny tube of the conventional MRI. I've never been present for a birth, but don't women need to, you know, move around at least a little when expelling human beings from…

That stuff is insanely effective. A few years ago I mistakenly turned the wrong burner on, and before it got hot enough to glow red I ended up slapping my hand on it by mistake (don't even ask, because I don't know. Unholy combination of idiocy and more idiocy). I was burned severely enough that I left some skin on…