I hope Bruce Arians promptly went into the visitors’ locker room, climbed on top of said lockers, and started screaming like an absolute dumbfuck.

I care.

From the shoehorned “fancy party” mention to the name misspell (for humor?) to the #woke “male gaze” phrase drop that implies you do understand the concept on some level to the dismissive “or w/e she was upset about” that follows it, I have zero clue what to make of this comment.

Don’t respond to the responses to your comment, Hank. As of 9:30 a.m. EST 12/22, I’ve read all five. Each is cancerously stupid.

Doesn’t the ending also include like three generations of Jim and Aurora’s inbred hick offspring getting off the ship once it lands?

For real. That’s why it reads like such bullshit.

So “crying dad tears” means “didn’t cry”?

Absolutely. The world and your mom had that in common, I heard.

You like that, Washington? YOU LIKE THAT?!?!?!

and Betty White

+1 men’s team suspension

This hate that this made me laugh openly at my desk despite a solid two seconds of trying to hold it in.

Is it even a hot take anymore to say that Gregg Popovich would make an infinitely better president than Donald Trump? Shit’s insane. I love this man. I say this as someone who rooted against the Spurs and their boring cold grip on championships for many years. The man just always Gets It.

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It’s to humiliate the guy

Oh. So you’re this kind of idiot. The kind who actually believes in the lie that Clinton publicly wished for Obama to be assassinated. Which would explain why Obama chose her to be his Secretary of State and why he openly, ardently campaigned for her this year. The woman who wanted him shot dead.

1) Were you or were you not talking about Bernie? Also, I never said you were a Democrat. If anything, I’d bet you’re Independent. You carry yourself as if you think you’re a special snowflake with Oh So Many Moral Objections To Traditional Politics, yadda yadda, vote with your conscience, bullshit bullshit, etc. (Not…

a candidate people would get behind.

Bitter Ravens fan here.

Cosby has remarked that the trial is “fixed,” adding that he stands “no chance” at winning.