The funny thing is that the hotel bill doesn’t say what movie was watched. I don’t generally look at prices in the “adult film” section, but I usually watch a “regular” movie or two a week. 1.) I travel a lot and spend up to 5 nights per week in a hotel, 2.) I don’t get to the theater to see movies there very often,…

I will never, ever forget the time I was checking out at Caesar’s in AC and the guy in front of me was grinding his hips into the counter, wearing silk pajama bottoms, as he scream about how he never ordered any porn.

There used to be a woman named Mary (not her real name) in our accounting office who used to semi-jokingly say that the company wouldn’t dare fire her because she had a ‘doomsday’ file.

Has this person not heard of “The Internet?”

we only looked at pay per view charges on a room when the guest asked to have them removed. if i recall correctly, the length record for a porn requested to be removed from the bill for “i didn’t watch that” was 9 minutes. that was a true outlier though, the majority were around 3 minutes.

“I turned it off after two minutes.” That. . .that’s not something you should tell strangers, sir. Save that conversation for your primary care physician. o_O

wait, people really return library books in post office boxes? i just... there are no words.

You clearly have no idea how shifts work at cheapass restaurants. Here is how my job works:

Not cruel when it wasn’t intentional. My take was they wanted the bowl hot to make sure the food stayed hot not to be mean to the customer.

yeah, had to deal with a hotel guest once who was a complete asshole. like asking to have porn charges taken off his room every day during his stay because “obviously he didn’t watch it, it was a mistake, he turned it off after 2 minutes” (dude, we know that’s not a “mistake” and now we know why you are alone) and…

The trick there is to do something so outrageous, that the Yelp review seems like a lie, and thus does not affect the reader’s opinion (outside of the star rating, of course).

A few nights ago, one of my Papa Johns co-workers fell down as he was about to put a pizza in the oven. Amazingly, he still got the pizza into the oven even as he was falling down. It was pretty remarkable.

I don’t know why, but it always bothers me when middle-aged+ folk curse at young children as if that is going to further increase the power dynamic in their favor and make them cower in fear while they appease this oh so important person who thought calling a 15 year old a “fucking little idiot” was going to make…

Another co-worker would routinely steam lattes with 2% instead of skim if the customers were rude about their orders, satisfied that they would leave ever-so-slightly fatter.

They came from an hour away with a thirst for loafage,

I once had a b-list celebrity start whining to me at one point because I wouldn't give him the moon and he pulled the “don’t you know who I am” card. It was so satisfying to look him dead in the eyes and reply, “No, I don’t, and I don’t care.” His face was priceless.

Upon my return to her table, she meekly asks me, “Can I have a glass of ice, please?” Wow, my first please from her. ...Wow, a thank you, too....she finally figured out not to screw with restaurant servers. The best part, they left a huge tip too, well in excess of 25%.

Sara is the hero we deserve

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF A SIBLING BEYOND SOMEONE TO CONSPIRE WITH AND BLAME WHEN IT ALL GOES TO SHIT!

I’m sick to death of the people saying, “The Duggar kids are always happy and smiling, so they’re obviously a great Christian family.” No, they’re fucking not. They’re beaten unless they act happy.