and now i’m doin’ mine - how’s that for symmetry?

Tears of joy! Stay safe out there, folks!

Pence on the streets of Chicago last night:

Just don’t sign while protesting. At all. Ever.

The only person with a more punchable face than Cruz is this slimy rat bastard.

Agreed. It is a longshot at best. However, I have the misfortune to have Cruz and Cornyn as my senators, so I’m trying to be optimistic about urging them to act.

Cheetolini. I’m totally using that.

Cruz is a dick, and his legendary unpopularity in the senate and in college is hilarious, but if he pulls it together he could be a useful dick. He has to hate Trump more than anybody else out there (the blackest of hearts can hold the most hate), and I can’t help thinking he is a snake in the grass, just waiting to…

Hey now. We all know that Ted Cruz eats babies...he doesn’t fuck rats. You’re thinking about Paul Ryan.

They’re like the evil Larry, Moe and Shemp of congress.

Cruz and Rubio both look brilliant in comparison.

https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/

Silver lining: everything ends.

FUUUUUUCK THAT GUY

Counterpoint: a silver lining on an umbrella would be tacky, heavy, and useless.

#FreeMelania

You can see the sparks between the Obamas. There really doesn’t seem to be much between the Trumps.

So where’s the plagiarism aside from the five words “back to you... the people”?