I’m excluding centers as I think they should be a separate category. So my list goes: Jordan, James, Bryant, Magic. 

Eh, the mafia has been pretty much dismantled. They’re pretty much nothing nowadays. Once sports gambling is fully legal they’ll be all but gone. 

To be fair your father has probably been that way his whole life. 

Those two couldn’t coordinate a successful Taco Bell order. 

“I show up in all the biggest and best manifestos. Its a manifesto folks, not just a tweet. It’s serious stuff. These manifesto people are serious people. Some are fine people I’m sure. But this one mentioned me so it’s the best”

While it’s obviously an idiotic conspiracy theory, if it was true that is the exact response I would expect from the UK. 

I like both of them but a mayor and a failed gubernatorial candidate are not going to win the presidency. We need to beat Trump. 

I made this comment earlier on another article but I’ll make it again. If I only got my news from Splinter, I would think that Steve King and Beto O’Rourke are a couple of terrible politicians with Beto being slightly worse. 

This is a perfect description. 

If I exclusively got my news from Splinter I would think that Beto and Steve King are two terrible politicians but Beto was slightly worse.

If I wanted to interact I wouldn’t be watching TV or a movie. 

c) THE MOTHERFUCKING CONSTANT AUTOPLAYING THINGS!!!!

If you were to replace me with Bear Grylls in any one of the episodes of his show, and given me whatever help he had, I would be dead before the first commercial in every episode. 

I mean, even in his original show he’d drink pee after being stranded for like 45 minutes. I think the guy just likes drinking pee. To each their own. 

Ugh. Too far. 

Because he’s the third best basketball player to ever step on the court. He’s absolutely boring and has the personality of a house plant, but people are going to be interested in anything having to do with an athlete of his magnitude. Same thing with Jordan by the way. He’s boring and an all around terrible person,…

It’s SLAM magazine. First of all, no one reads it. Second of all, there’s no way Kobe would talk to them if they talked about him raping. It’s not the NY Times or even The Atlantic. Why waste a blog post on SLAM magazine’s coverage of Kobe Bryant not being hard hitting enough. It’s actually comical that you took the…

Nah he’ll just appoint Candace Owens. 

Don’t worry. He’s in charge of the nuclear arsenal. What could possibly go wrong? I’m sure he’s doing just fine. 

I picture George Costanza working on the Penske file.