Milla IS such a pretty girl.

Thanks for being such an inspiration to me, Ms. Lee.

Mexico has been telling you bad things about me, but she’s a total BITCH and I’m on to her little games. She’s a HATER and I won’t deal with her dramaz!

I forwarded the article to Anonymous. Maybe they can help with some mischief of their own.

Next up: ensuring peanut butter cookies are included in ALL school lunches, just to show those so-called “allergic” kids how great America is.

Duh, we perform the important function of keeping society in line. If not for cranky old bitches like me, children would not know to get down off that, stop playing that so-called music so loud, and stay off neighbor’s lawns.

It’s kind of weird to think about, but there are OTHER cultures.

These legislators are such perverts. Always thinking about sex and obsessing about private parts. It’s disgusting.

OMG my glasses. I got glasses that I thought looked like John Lennon, but they had that coating that darkens outdoors and never quite lightens indoors, so I looked shady and weird, and anyway the glasses were more “crazy aunt” than John Lennon. Plus I loved the color green, and I looked like death in green but nobody…

It was my dad’s drunken emotional stuntedness and inability to communicate with me that set me up for all the relationships I had with skeevy older guys. I was desperately looking for a male to approve of me, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to get that at home.

Are you kidding?

The best tech tool I ever found was a Chrome extension that makes youtube comments disappear. It has probably saved me from having a heart attack.

Lemme guess.... She was doing it “for the attention.”

It’s sad that neither of them have the charisma to join the Republican candidates’ welfare program (aka a gig on Fox News).

Trump aside (because we can agree he is the worst, can’t we?) which one of the Republicans is the worst? Show your work. I know you have a lot to choose from!

Dowager Countess Grantham, I presume?

I’m surprised you weren’t killed, rolled up in a yoga mat, and left in a dumpster behind Co-opportunity.

WHO HAS IT? I can go get it, but only after lunch. I have some errands to do.

Everyone in Santa Monica is like this, which is why it is the worst place on earth.