I am a diehard Michigan fan but this is my favorite hit. And it was right after Michigan robbed them on a bad call.

Obligatory.

YEAAAAAAAAAH

Huh. He doesn’t look Japanese.

Hey Shohei. Get behind the plate or get the fuck out.

I truly hope that the Royals can now break through the unofficially acknowledged barrier to advancement that has been limiting them with their old owner. Hopefully some old columnist will come up with a term to describe it.

The forward slash! Who the fuck uses a forward slash for anything?... Ah. Right. Well, what about the thingie above the forward slash? The |?

When even Gronk is smart enough to retire, it’s hard to hold a grudge against Andrew Luck

I know exactly how Andrew Luck feels. I mean, I don’t have a degree from Stanford or a bunch of athletic ability or millions of dollars or a super-high IQ. But I have been booed by people in Indianapolis. And my boss does a lot of drugs.

Who’s the lone gentleman here?  It’s me, right?

It clocks in just before ‘Thanksgiving Dinner.’

I was sitting in the right field stands at Nats park back when he was playing for the Cardinals. The stadium was quiet because it had been a fairly uneventful game, and I’d had a lot to drink, so I decided to heckle him.

A lot of people can’t handle witnessing the truth. 

Pro-Tip: If you want to increase traffic, don’t call it an Oakland Athletics blog. Say it’s a very early blog about the 2022 Yankees.

***Phone rings***

Like most people, they criticize in others what they secretly despise about themselves, you fat asshole. 

“I used to have trouble getting it up, because of E.D.*”

I hate to align myself even slightly with the Old Men Yelling At Clouds, but I also do not find the Three True Outcome Era to be a particularly enthralling version of the game.

I mean, Martha Washington, Indira Ghandi, Marie Curie, Susan B Anthony, Madonna, Virgin Mary, Beyonce, Cleopatra, Betty Ford, Margaret Thatcher, Serena and Venus Williams, and Mother Theresa are all more famous and that’s just off the top of my head.