Dunno, man; if any bluesman, ever, deserves to be called "cuddly," I'd say it's Mississippi John Hurt.

The Cubs won the World Series. We're lucky Bill Murray's still alive.

Wh - why is DJ Khaled suddenly everywhere, selling everything?

Rest assured, I was. Hell, I had a relationship like that once. It was fun for about three weeks.

You do know I was joking, right?

Saying it's a social experiment makes me feel less like a dirtbag.

I got a blowjob during Chain Reaction. Then I fell asleep. That was a great time.

Oh Christ no. (I would, however, like to go to the Gathering once, as a sort of sociological experiment.)

The first day of vacation? That's fucking ice cold. Holy shit.

And we could have sex there! (I'm kidding, I'm kidding.)

I think I love you.

I was eighteen and dating a girl who was going to school about a thousand miles from where I lived. We'd decided that over Valentine's Day break, we'd sleep together for the first time. I spent a good few hundred bucks that I didn't have on a round-trip train ticket, a bottle of Dom, and some other stuff, and wrote…

What the fuck kind of reason to break up is that? You dodged one there.

Oof.

I knew a girl in high school who carved a dude's initials into her stomach one day in math class.

Oh, I'm sure.

Shut it down. Evil Lincoln wins.

Your point?

That's entirely fair. It's just a sort of alien feeling to me considering my lifelong antipathy toward the Grammys. I didn't mean to make it seem I begrudged anyone their frustration (or right to complain.)

I actually looked it up: Nirvana won for Unplugged, which doesn't really count, and was nominated a couple other times. But, yeah: big fucking deal. (1992, when all that shit was blowing up, was the year Natalie Cole swept, incidentally.)