It’s not even remotely romantic, don’t worry. He’s just a mentor/friend/father figure. No grossness, promise.

I read it—the main character is completely insufferable.

I got two the evening I got engaged from a surprise engagement dinner. I read them both the next day and panicked and hid them. Pinterest I can handle, the magazines are much more stressful for some reason.

Yes, I’ve caught myself using the phrases “chavari chairs” and “escort card display” recently in when talking about my wedding and then both times immediately wanted to stab myself in the frontal lobe. It is amazing the amount of weird lingo you pick up.

I had a complete panic attack because my fiance never bought a gift for his best friend’s wedding (in which he was the best man). We flew across the country for it and obviously he shelled out for suit rental/bachelor party/hotel, etc. We received an absolutely lovely thank you note from them three weeks after the…

Organized triathlons always have photographers and those pictures are some of the worst I have ever seen of myself. I do NOT look good when I run. And then my mom took a bunch of pictures after my first one, after I’d dumped water all over my head, and I look like an exhausted and wet tomato (obviously super red, but…

A friend-of-a-friend faked having leukemia for over a year, but solely for attention. Friends would drive her to her appointments and she would cry about how terribly her boyfriend treated her and how he didn’t even care that he had cancer. Turns out he didn’t know she was faking this among her friends, and neither…

I saw her perform improv live once (it was a weird format in which they were just given topics to riff on) and she was entirely awkward, and not funny in the slightest. I thought she had a lot of potential but she spent the majority of her set making faces at the audience because she couldn’t think of anything to say.

I’m at work until 7:15pm PT and my boss won’t let me leave early...so DVR-ing and racing home to play catch up and do my drinking game (alone).

• Take your husband to the first performance of your nanny’s level 1 improv class.

A friend of mine wrote on a show that he did a guest starring role on and he was a spectacular douche the entire time they were taping, so your suspicions are well-founded.

Go to the Boboli Gardens in Florence and just wander around. The other side of the Arno is completely wonderful and there are great and less touristy restaurants.

I just snorted my tea out of my nose. It was quite painful. I also feel terrible for laughing, but there you go.

That’s how I feel about Kraft macaroni and cheese. And I have to boil the water and cook it, so it’s slightly more effort than (completely nasty) easy mac.

I do that as well, regardless of the size of the dog. My fiancé likes to point out that some of them are in fact closer to horse-sized. My good friend also does this, but says it in a really deep and crazy demon-like voice. It occasionally frightens their owners, but oh well.

She was originally going to be cast in Gone Girl as well, but ended up deciding to only produce it instead. I think she would have been fabulous.

Yeah, it was rather fabulous. Loved her on the show.

My cat is looking at my phone with disdain and major confusion.

TAYE DIGGS CHECKED ME OUT AT THE GYM ONCE. It was by far the highlight of my entire year. To be fair, I had just gotten a blowout and had changed into clothes for a wedding so I looked fabulous—but it was FUCKING AMAZING.

My friend is allergic to strawberries (stomachache allergic, not break-out-in-hives allergic), and this is how she feels about them. She LOVES them and if she’s going to eat one, she’s going to eat 40.