So…kinda like if Black Lives Matter was run exclusively by white people.

You mean the whole point of your existence is NOT to make your asshole brother a better person?

Good luck having a fashion industry without any gay people, fucker.

Don't you write a song now, Dewey Cox!

No, Taken definitely invented the "man of action murders dozens for revenge" genre. No one had ever thought of that before.

I laughed when I saw Walk Among the Tombstones, which is actually a solid little noir thriller that barely resembles Taken at all, but they still had to include a bit where Neeson threatens someone over the phone.

This reminds me of the bit in Punisher: War Zone where the parkour guy gets exploded.

I'd prefer to be Vincennes. Dude was a fucking pimp.

I think I spent about a third of that film on the verge of tears.

Unfriended is surprisingly excellent, making extremely effective use of its gimmick. I even bought the damn thing on Blu-ray.

I went to Wizard World in Chicago last year and regretted not getting a picture with Carrie. A few months later, I REALLY regretted it.

A faithful adaptation would have to be a ten-part miniseries. Brian Helgeland did an incredible job retaining the spirit of the novel but making it somewhat its own thing.

Neither. Whether I connect through Bluetooth or USB, my iPhone plays…whatever it is I was last playing.

Okay, subjectivity, etc. etc., but one must be really drunk to think Titanic is better than LA Confidential, right?

How else am I supposed to find out what it's going to look like when I make a really terrible mistake on Halloween?

Wilful obtuseness is boring as shit, dude. Give it up.

And where have you been spending your nights, handsome?

Around the Fur is brilliant. I still find it a shame that Deftones were thrown in with Limp Bizkit, Korn, etc. They're superficially similar, but their music is actually interesting.

I wish Ava was my big sister. She'd be all cool and encouraging. AND THEN MAYBE I COULD MAKE SOMETHING OF MY LIFE FINALLY

Almost certainly. It probably lives in Walmarts exclusively these days.