What’s that old saying? “Never get in an ass-kicking contest with a one-legged man.”

“Mine was Colin Kaepernick,” said no one. Ever.

When I fly Southwest, I make sure that all of my tattoos are easily visible and I usually put a band aid on my face. Unless the flight is fully booked, I usually end up with an empty row.

Green was hoping to kick around some new ideas.

I guess we’re not going to talk about Leslie Mann’s mispronunciation of the show’s title? Because “Silicone Valley” is a vastly different premise for a show.

Oh! and here’s the opposite... Nancy Sinatra done in a bad NIN nails style

Wes Craven meets G ‘n’ R...

Nope.

If this upsets you, you’re obviously lack toes intolerant.

This would be far more entertaining if it was at least remotely clever. My thirteen year-old cousin can talk trash better than this garbage.

Whoa! I make those hats and t-shirts.

But the real doozie was this little tidbit captured backstage on a hot mic when Hillary glibly declares “sometimes you just have to grab life by the dick!”

No 1. reason to not root for the Dodgers: Beach Balls.

Neither can Arrieta.

I will also miss this installment. It was everything that 500 Days of Kristin wasn’t.

Urban Outfitters ripped off yet another friend of mine this week. It never ends.

This is what — 6 stories on this in 12 hours? This is reaching Trump saturation levels.

Maybe this is just the kinda shake-up the Giants need to get their act together.

Like, that sucks and all but has he been cast as Roy Batty yet for that new Bladerunner? Cuz someone needs to get on that pronto.

Way to reinforce Zara’s defense in the title. Maybe an edit?