The thing I have the biggest problem with here is THE FUCKING MILE WIDE TRAIL OF EVIDENCE THEY LEFT BEHIND THEM!!! WHO THE HELL PLANS A DOUBLE HOMIDICE OVER TEXT MESSAGES!!! This is an a metric fuckton of shit brought to light by a trio of individuals who have never seen a movie, or read a book, or spoken to a person.

I can’t help but think these people needed to watch a Law & Order marathon every once in a while. Texts? Gun residue on your hands and clothes? Amateur hour!

Why? Because it rapes your taste buds?

This is a much more valid complaint.

I think the burger is on top of an overturned bamboo steamer. That would make the lid the appropriate size to contain the burger. I believe they did it to evoke the image of a steamed pork bun.

you’re really fucking stupid, but maybe you’ll understand this if I use lots of caps:

So wait, is the pork breaded and then fried? Katsu burgers!

It looks like a public bathroom countertop.

Exactly how many Texans over the age of 200 are there?

To my dear Mexican-American brothers and sisters in Texas,

Sure, when Justin Bieber goes outside naked and people see him it’s a violation of his privacy. When I go outside my front door in my underwear and people see me I’m “drunk and disorderly” and “no longer welcome at public parks.”

I REST MY CASE.

To quote that snopes article:

Hell no, it will be Jennifer Lawrence. Just because.

Is this real? I want this to be real so very badly.

Thirstin’ Moore.

Twitter - the medium for thirsty thirstingtons.

Nooooo TILDA SWINTON.