That looks fucking awesome.

But are they sandwiches?

Harold’s?

The Root posted an article on this which was then cross-posted to Zombie Deadspin.  Very confused on how to proceed.

Habemas Papa!

Some executives dream up cheez-it pizzas.  Some take a website with 20 million monthly unique page views and burn it to the ground.  

I’ve tried foie gras a few times and I really just don’t get what everyone loves about it.  It’s too rich for me.  That said, this ban is stupid. 

We generally don’t eat cute animals.  Cats are adorable so they are not food.  Cows are ugly so...

I know sometimes that on the internet people say things that they normally wouldn’t say because of the cloak of anonymity so I want you to know how sincere I am when I also tell you to EAT SHIT

I stopped trick or treating to call Out the c-suite gutless turds at G/O for shutting down commenting at deadspin. It really takes talent to ruin a great and profitable website because reasons. Eat shit, dicklicks. 

Putting fruity/sour candy ahead of chocolate candy is a take nearly as bad as ranking Steely Dan as anywhere above “getting hit by a tour bus” on a list ranking classic rock bands.  On the other hand, you have not listed any hideous mint-chocolate candies and for that you should be commended. 

This seems like it’s about sports, but I feel like I’m missing something. Like there’s a message hidden in it that I’m too stupid to understand.

Your reply is addressed approximately 3 lines above my (infallibly correct) Steely Dan take. 

Sabathia (the season is still technically going). 

Deadspin is my go-to website. I check it several times a day. It’s a privilege to be ungreyed. I started reading in law school and believe it or not I found Deadspin because Whitlock posted some article on foxsports in like 2008 about his favorite sports websites. So you can blame him for me being here.

Honestly if all of you just disappeared off the face of the earth, I probably wouldn’t even notice the dearth of bad takes. 

I never ordered this growing up, but my wife introduced me to beef chow fun. Shrimp and pork are also good, but for some reason the beef works better for me. Also, nobody took wonton soup. WE HAVE VERY DIFFERENT IDEAS ABOUT CHINESE FOOD.

Jim Spanfeller has sports taeks

You are a good boy, Tom.

Hey remember when the RWNJ media talked about Obama’s jeans at the All Star Game for a week?  That was ok.