Suite: Judy Blue Eyes is a Stephen Stills song, recorded by CSN on their first album a year before Neil joined to make CSNY a thing (intermittently, at least).

It’s normal to subconsciously repress traumatic memories, especially if they involve fat controllers (WTF they actually called him that...)

Point of order... that was Henry, not James.  Henry the green kvetch, not James the red prick. 

Every single one of those trains should be FIRED, no one can have that many critically negligent accidents and still keep their job.  Also, Gordon is a bitch. 

I would like an entire subcategory where we can discuss problematic children’s programming in-depth, as people without small children in their lives seem to have no idea why Thomas the Tank Engine enrages me so much despite my fond childhood memories of George Carlin and Ringo Starr as conductors. 

I’ve seen no mention of Cthulhu. I am disappointed. We could use a monster indifferent to the existence of humanity to cleanse this dumpster fire.

Omgggggggggggg princess didn’t like being called out for enabling her sociopathic father? Womp womp. 

There’s definitely the legal-defense motive, but I would assume no matter what the topic, ANYONE would think, “this is so batshit no one would believe me unless I come with receipts.”  

Tiniest violin.

Wow, Charlie, me too! Can someone come pay my rent now?

Fausty is not only Disney-level adorable, he’s also the nicest person in the world. It’s awful. I mean, I’d much rather he stayed in broadcasting, but jeebus he’d be such a win for Jeopardy for the next 40 years.

Right - my minions don’t take it because I’m worried a child may be at risk of stroke or heart attack. They take it because their brains are atypical and DHA is supposed to help shore up against some of that. None of that is life-threatening, but it could definitely change their long-term outcomes.

I have a problem with pulling out my eyelashes when I get stressed and having mascara on them makes the pulling all the more gratifying. So one more for the pile “Goodbye bald eyelids and crunchy lashes in my anxious fingers.”

Question: How hard did John Kelly have to slap his hand for this to happen? 

That feels like a disproportionate number of old pickups in the parking lot.  Did period-appropriate sedans and wagons not survive at the same rate? Do 1980's Indianans who shop at malls favor the pickup at above-average rates? WHY ALL THE SINGLE CAB FORDS? 

BUT I THOUGHT WE WERE PRO-LIFE, ALL FETUSES MATTER

I know you meant Jeff Daniels, but I’m really harshing on the mental image of Jeff Bridges as the Dude, filming a diarrhea scene. Not cool, man.

Wow, Denmark is really ramping up that vintage fascism. What a surprise from a country that gave Hitler wet dreams and immediately ceded power to the invading Nazi forces.

Same. 34, child of Midwestern transplant evangelical Republicans who are STILL single issue voters with blinders the size of baking sheets. Columbine in our freshman year, 9/11 in our senior year, and Iraq all through college. I’ve spent years wearing myself out trying to wake people up, trying to explain why you…

I’m in agreement with everyone saying read the books AND TALK ABOUT THE PROBLEMATIC PARTS.  I think it’s very critical for kids to know and understand where the culture has come from, why certain groups have been and still are marginalized, and how the people who do so may come from anywhere (the people you know and…