This seems contrary to the spirit of Mario Kart which is to hurl obscenities at your competitors because seriously Ryan?! THREE FUCKING RED SHELLS?!

meanwhile my dog would take off like a rocket and likely be somewhere between 2nd base and left center before she realized that I was still holding the ball.

That first video: my dumbass dog would jump and take the bat to her ear 10 out of 10 times.

Several teams have expressed interest, but the dog’s agent has made it clear his client will only play for Lindy Ruff.

Guess what Edith? In the future, your vote is going to count exactly the same as a current 5 year old boy who says “Look what I have” while holding a piece of his own poop in his hand.

Ping of the puck going off the post woulda been my number one. When I played I almost liked hitting the post as much as actually scoring.

You’re killin’ me, falls.

“PLAY IT ON THE GO!*”

Forget racism; the logic behind that paragraph is so frighteningly dumb that this man should not be a paid writer.

Dude donated $10 million to a children’s hospital in Montreal. They named the atrium after him.

Skins gave the GM permission to go to the combine, only to take it back. Typical.

We should probably trade for him and Lebron.

The Padres say it’s not that bad, but it feels bad.

Matt Purke looks like he only plays baseball ironically. Sort of like he wants to go back to the minors because nobody’s heard of the team he was playing on.

“That’s not a punch. That’s just normal kinesiology.” - Draymond Green

Ah, the new iPod Scuffle

Everyone have their safety pins ready?