Does it include doctors? Mum, Dad, grandparents and babysitters who may have bathed them as a baby? Does one need to make a graph depicting who and in what way or for what reason the penis was touched?

As they old saying goes, "I always tell a guy I'm Bi on the first date. I let him figure out the Polar on his own!"

While I would love a new kitten (or puppy) I don't think that travel via the post would be very beneficial to them. So I will refrain from explaining why. But I know. Trust me, I know.

Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka (wonder if they've hyphenated their names now?) They seem like they'd be a riot. And I'd make Neil literally sing for his supper. I have no problems being upstaged on my big day, I'm not over fond of being the centre of attention at any rate.

I wonder if Kimye have seen this and are sitting around all pissed. "So they can't make it to Italy for OUR wedding, but they can find the time for some randoms?"

I think some people are too stupid to be embarrassed.

I feel your pain. So much stupid in the world.

Good for you. Do you feel better for having wasted your time here telling total strangers that?

No, she's absolutely gobsmackingly beautiful. I've always thought so. Even back when I didn't realise that she also seems to be a kick ass human being.

Or, maybe they just appreciated the fact that in this day and age, pretty much nobody with the level of celebrity and public scrutiny that they have can ever do anything in real, actual privacy, so decided to make the best of a bad situation and have the wedding that they would want to have and make the best of an…

I love it. It's simple and smacks of everything that I love about her. It says, I don't care what anybody else except for my nearest and dearest think. And here, people who don't know me but somehow really give a shit about what I do, here are photos of me that I sold to a magazine and then donated the money to a…

I work in a supermarket deli and a couple of months ago, a woman came in and complained to us because she'd bought a pre-packaged block of Edam cheese and she and her family had eaten the wax rind. Every single bit of it. Despite the fact that she said that nobody enjoyed it, apparently they continued to eat it…

Teehee. She's my spirit animal.

Not saying that the poo perpetrator wasn't a goliath, but they may not have been. My poor sister (and god help me if she ever reads this) when she was only about seven years old, was stuck in the toilet once for hours and we could all hear her crying. I mean, she was in real distress. She wouldn't unlock the door…

While I agree with you about Britney, I can't sign off on your assessment of why people diss the Beibs. He acts like a self-entitled douche canoe with a complete disregard for other people or the law. He deserves no respect whatsoever for his social image or his person. I can't speak for his music, because I can't…

I used to cook in one of those pubs here is Oz that has the basic "Choose a steak", then "Choose a sauce" with an "Add a topper for $2" option section of the menu. This one guy used to come in every Saturday for Texas Hold 'Em poker and order a well-done(!!!!) eye fillet with both pepper and mushroom gravy, then get…

Chick pea flour is also known as besan flour and gram flour. It's one of the more commonly used flours in many cuisines including Indian, Pakinstani, Nepali and Bangladeshi. All of those yummy bread dishes we love? Bhajis? Pakoras? Papadums? Traditionally made from besan.

Um....that's...just......seriously, are you this angry and hate filled and ill-wishing to strangers in real life? Or is it only in the relatively safe environment of internet anonymity that you demonstrate that you are a psychopath?

Well, the one positive that I can take from this is that we don't need to worry about this delight to humanity breeding.

In the second year of my apprenticeship, the head chef at the restaurant I was working at went off sick for a month after collapsing at work. He didn't get replaced so the other apprentice and I were running the kitchen without supervision. One evening, when I was doing the entire day by myself (it was the other…