I thought it was those who can’t, teach?

“Yeah, but what happens when the trophy won’t touch you?!”

The only legitimate question in this situation came from Andy Reid, who asked if he could eat the Rich.

[Cums]

When it comes to the news, my liver has the same advice as Kevin Durant.

And... rolling pins? I guess it’s rolling pins time?

ISIS prefers this version of “Baby Fires Rocket, Celebrates with Chocolate Cake.”

I guess it technically is trying since it involves some sort of effort—but it’s doesn’t include more pain, more time or more money.

According to previous internet videos, I thought the shit was supposed to go IN the German’s mouth.

It’s truly amazing he overcame his father to achieve all that he has, but I’m afraid this is just going to encourage Adrian Peterson.

Jimmy ChitPeckerwood.

If he’s going to Frankenstein a quarterback, Peyton Manning looks like he beat him to it.

“See?!”

Libertarians are the worst, but Irwin R. Schyster was a total dick.

Pictured: Who would’ve guessed Buffalo Bill was a baseball fan?

Let’s give Maria Bartiromo credit for clarifying that the missiles were “unmanned.”

Why doesn’t the NBA mind the player-for-a-day thing when it comes to Derrick Rose?

Fake news! An Oral faith exam is a Catholic thing.

How the hell can FoxTrax afford the naming/display rights of an NHL arena?