“Where is light at end of tunnel?” was also a Mongo outtake from Blazing Saddles.

“Yeah, but what has he done for Argentina’s U-13 team?”

34 freebies in one night? Who the hell invited him on a recruiting trip to Louisville?

I’m glad this is the last thing I will read at my desk. Thank you.

I can’t wait for Whitlock’s response.

“If anyone knows how to bunker down, it’s me.”

Sessions is not a completely useless asshole. When told the mother of his child lost her apartment, he did offer to help by saying, “Well, retrace your steps. Where do you last remember seeing it?”

Also in NHL tax news, according to Mr. and Mrs. Johnson’s latest filings, Jack still owes them $50.

“Like shit through a tin horn.”

It’s possible to be overblown?!

Probably best they didn’t take Gronk’s suggestion of the Fighting Sioux Flays.

Denzel has been questionable since Training Day.

Tried every other goddamn approach...

Can anyone lend me $6,000 and a violin?

Ha. You said “titties.”

I still haven’t forgiven you for deciding that “more than” and “over” are basically synonymous, AP Stylebook.

“The country will never be divided”? I’d only believe from a prime minister.

Knicks fans might be able to accept that Dream Shake instead of the one involving James Dolan and a grand mal seizure.

Glad we can still agree on Jake Delhomme.

Thinking he’d call the state’s attorney’s bluff, Terrence Cody turned out to be a terrible Lippe reader.