“You ain’t in the SEC?”

More like Pudelli, amirite?

“Great. Only 22 years too late.”

“Great. Only 12 years too late.”

He talked about the origin of the whole “Summer of ‘69” thing when he was on Q... which is weird to watch now that we know that host is as creepy as he sounds.

Sharted during warm-ups for rec league soccer at age 30. It was tiny so I ditched my underpants, but there was still a bit of butt juice on my shorts. I played one of the best games of my life. I consider it my Flu Game.

You can bet he won’t rest until he embarrasses the Angels... or at least until the meth does its thing.

When it comes embarrassing displays of sexism, it’s still tough to beat Chicago sports fans... I mean media:

My father passed away in September after an eight-year illness. My mom mentioned spending time with a “friend” by Thanksgiving. This friend was a widower who had spent time hanging out with both my parents. I think it began so quickly after the fact, my initial reaction was “fuck it, she deserves to do whatever she…

Yet not as groovy as a photographer’s Deee-Lite.

This ripped the heart out of Pelican fans, but this dude’s entire career should rip the heart out of fans of the Timberwolves.

Of all Eugene Levy’s body parts to sag, I wouldn’t’ve guessed those would be the first.

You can’t coach size, but another coach can apparently will himself to 6’2”?

From the looks of him, Kevin Iole also had a tantrum when Ren wanted to host a high school dance.

My cat’s the worst—he hates me, has disdain for all strangers, barks out the window at birds—and that makes him the best.

He’s not so much depressed as desmondent.

Jesus Christ, the editing of that top video makes Gravity look like something from World Star.

There’s never an excuse for violence, but Goodyear tires everybody.

OK, who ordered the Rubén knuckle sandwich?

Marko actually comes from the small ethnic enclave of Derpia.