All of this, all of it, everything you wrote.

Or, she’s an excellent politician.

He doesn’t just go ahead and does it. He tries to turn me on and he’s often successful and when he’s not he understands.

With a boyfriend? Not normal. With a husband? .... well ....

I guess it depends on the season. We always had prunes for devils - they’re moister. I don’t really like dates.

If the people buying from the catalog were truly snooty they would have ANGELS on horseback which are oysters wrapped in bacon.

Boom! Exactly

Please remember this about Baptists:

i’m with you all the way, Kevin.

Prince wrote that song. But anyway.

And wetting their beds. Get the bed wetters!

I’m not in the USA but I’m determined to get partial credit for submitting a photo. (What’s with all the “I already ate my homework” excuses?)

Is #Thisiswhyyouarefat still a thing? Because your photo is perfect for it.

I want to eat that out of my monitor. Also, A+ for styling.

I hope nobody finds the body.

Fuck her if she’s jealous of your tits. What a passive aggressive bitch.

No, it’s the yams and marshmallows that are strange. WTF

He brought a lot of beer and weed and food this year.

The brevity and minimization is how you know it’s REAL.

You. Totally. WIN. This thread.