Sometimes I imagine websites like the AV Club like those cop briefings you see in the movies where the head cop is assigning duty rosters. I envision your boss (an overbearing Frank McRae type) saying “HASSENGER! The Christmas Chronicles Part II!  Was that an eye-roll, Hassenger?  Be grateful that you’re not on the…

I mean, it’s a situation where a MAGA chud took his hat off in a public place, so you know it’s a farce.

It looks like they bought a $4 iPhone photo filter app.

It’s not rotoscoping, it’s trioscoping. It’s a totally different technique altogether.

With a title that sounds like a seventies condom.

Everyone loves a crazy monkey.

I didn’t even read that book, I grew up among kids who were told that learning is for stupid people because smart people are farmers or truck drivers. 

Yeah, rural PA born and raised here and this:

Oh my Beebo. He’s playing that “game” that got everyone so addicted that Wesley had to save the day. 

Does this mean you guys are going to stop whining about Baldwin’s impersonation every week? Thank fucking Christ.

Mark Esper was obviously never going to work out with Trump, what with Trump’s blatant disregard and refusal to even recognize the longstanding international “Smelt It/Dealt It” agreement of 1946.

Paul Schaffer’s greatest (and most commonly forgotten) star turn.

Now imagining Rudy as the promoter who begs to be kicked in the ass and smashing eggs in his own face after a disastrous appearance.

Exactly! “Oh there’s a big parking lot there too that’s perfect!”

He was there to visit the adult bookstore next door and figured he’d kill 2 birds with one stone.

The next conference will be at the Ritz . . . cracker factory.

“Hello Cleveland!”

“I do not, for one, think that the problem was that the campaign was down. I think that the problem may have been that there was a Trump Tower monument on the stage that was in danger of being crushed by a dwarf.”

I would like to know how to “book” a parking lot. Trump obviously tweeted about the Four Seasons hotel, and his goons had to scramble to find a “Four Seasons” something close by.